Praying Waters Souls

During Mass today, I noted synergy between my early morning reading and the sermon.  This morning, before I went to Mass, I was reading some spiritual maxims written by Saint John of the Cross, the Carmelite friar and mystic who lived in Spain in the sixteenth century.  Among other axioms written by him, this morning I read how he wrote that "By prayer aridity is expelled, devotion increased, and the interior practice of virtue is established in the soul."  

Then, on this first Sunday of Advent, I attended Mass at 7:30 a.m. here in Redwood City.  During the sermon, the priest analogized us to cornstalks.  He also likened how much we pray, and with how much devotion, and under what circumstances, as being analogous to the extent to which a cornstalk is rooted in the ground.  

In the midst of arid, dry weather, the roots of a cornstalk grow deeper into the ground as they search for water.  So too when we experience spiritual aridity, that is, dryness in prayer, God is calling us to persist in our faith and in our prayer and to deepen our relationship with Him.  As Saint John of the Cross tells us, we expel aridity by praying.  By continuing to pray in the midst of spiritual dryness, we show God that we love Him.  God wants us to seek Him humbly in earnest.    

Roots stabilize the cornstalk.  With deep and extensive roots, a cornstalk can withstand strong winds.  So too when we weather severe storms in life, if we have a deep, devoted, fervent prayer life, through the grace of God, we will resist any and all challenges which we encounter.  

The priest added that the liturgical seasons of Advent and Lent are characterized by more intense fasting and prayer than usual.   He offered encouragement to more deeply enter into prayer in this Advent season.  

During Advent, as we meditate upon the birth of Jesus which we will soon celebrate, we are invited to live more ascetically over these next few weeks.  At times we experience periods of spiritual aridity which we do not consciously choose, and are called upon then to pray more intensely.  Yet at certain times in the liturgical calendar, we are also called to make more intense sacrifices of prayer and fasting, such as during Advent and Lent.  Thus in this current Advent season, we are invited to plumb the depths of own our souls more deeply in prayer.  In doing so in still, silent solitude, we seek a conscious communion with Jesus which can strengthen us against whatever storms may confront us in our lives.  

Keep Them Out

Here at the Redwood City Catholic Worker House we've got a fabulous friend who shows up here and helps us out.  Here I'll call him "Mack."  Sometimes we call Mack and he gladly comes over and carts away donated items which no one wants.  

Recently I was on the sidewalk in front of the house when Mack was gathering things to haul away.  Completely unrelated to what we had just been discussing, Mack suddenly told me that he has multiple mental health diagnoses.  As he's sharing this personal information with me out in public, he's talking quickly, in an animated fashion.  He's a bundle of energy, yet he channels that seemingly inexhaustible and constant and vigorous flow of energy into jumping forward and assisting others however he can.  I so enjoy being in his presence; I feel like infrequently do I cross paths with such a giving person who always seems to be ready to help out and serve whenever he's asked.  

After Mack had finished loading the unwanted items into the back of his pickup truck, as he's driving down the street, he stops.  He leans out the window.  He calls out to me across the street, "I keep hearing voices.  I don't want to be hearing these voices.  People say to me, 'Why don't you try ear plugs?'  I tell them, 'No!  That'll keep the voices in my head!  I don't want to keep the voices inside my head!'"  

Beyond Only Thanksgiving

Today's Gospel reading is from Luke 17:11-19.  There we hear that 

As Jesus continued his journey to Jerusalem,
he traveled through Samaria and Galilee.
As he was entering a village, ten persons with leprosy met him.  
They stood at a distance from him and raised their voices, saying, 
“Jesus, Master! Have pity on us!”  
And when he saw them, he said, 
“Go show yourselves to the priests.”  
As they were going they were cleansed.  
And one of them, realizing he had been healed, 
returned, glorifying God in a loud voice; 
and he fell at the feet of Jesus and thanked him.  
He was a Samaritan.  
Jesus said in reply, 
“Ten were cleansed, were they not?  
Where are the other nine?  
Has none but this foreigner returned to give thanks to God?”  
Then he said to him, “Stand up and go; 
your faith has saved you.”  

In the reading, the ten men with leprosy call out to Jesus.  They call upon Jesus to heal them.  So too when we want something, we call out to God.  

I am reminded of an interview with Pope Francis which I recently saw.  In describing how people pray, the Pope remarked that often we ask God for things and we thank God for things.  The Pope explained that we are indeed called to ask God for what we need and to thank God for what God gives us.  Yet the Pope asked whether we also praise God and if we adore God, as God calls us to do.  When I heard these words of the Pope, I felt that they were helpful guidance for which I was grateful.  

Often when we pray, we only petition God for what we want and thank God.  Yet when Thanksgiving Day is over, do we thank God just as much?  Do we thank God enough?  It is so easy to get what we want and not thank God for it.  We can also easily get into a habit of taking what we have for granted.  We have so much; are we grateful to God for all of it?  

I was struck today too in the reading by how the one man who returned to Jesus to thank Him was a Samaritan.  The Jews and Samaritans were at odds with each other: neither esteemed the other well.  Yet only one man returned to give thanks and praise to God, and he was a Samaritan.  

It is so easy to rely on our preconceptions of who we think that people are based on their belonging to a certain group, which we believe makes them different from us.  However, we have much to learn from others, especially those who are different from us.  

I think of the gracious and magnanimous hospitality I received from Moroccans when I was a Peace Corps Volunteer in Morocco.  Upon living there for two years, and being so warmly and generously received, I realized I had much to learn from people who had seemed so different from me.  

And why did that foreigner, the outsider, the different one, that one man receive the gift of healing from Jesus?  Jesus tells that one man that his faith saved him.  God works wonders in those who have faith in Him.  When we admit that we need God, God gives us what we need.  When we humble ourselves, God heals us.  

We have so much.  God has given to us so bountifully, and what He most wants to give us is so much more enriching than what we often request from Him.  We are called to thank God for so much, and to praise Him and to adore Him in His great love.  Having received so much from Him in His infinite love, which is so much greater than we are, we are called to be humble; we are called to realize that we were created to praise Him.  

All glory and praise and honor be unto God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and forever.  Amen.  

Investing In Humility

Last Wednesday the Gospel reading for the day was from Luke 19:11-28.  There we hear that 

While people were listening to Jesus speak, 
he proceeded to tell a parable because he was near Jerusalem 
and they thought that the Kingdom of God 
would appear there immediately.  
So he said, 
“A nobleman went off to a distant country 
to obtain the kingship for himself and then to return.  
He called ten of his servants and gave them ten gold coins 
and told them, ‘Engage in trade with these until I return.’  
His fellow citizens, however, despised him 
and sent a delegation after him to announce, 
‘We do not want this man to be our king.’  
But when he returned after obtaining the kingship, 
he had the servants called, to whom he had given the money, 
to learn what they had gained by trading.  
The first came forward and said,
‘Sir, your gold coin has earned ten additional ones.’
He replied, ‘Well done, good servant!  
You have been faithful in this very small matter; 
take charge of ten cities.’  
Then the second came and reported, 
‘Your gold coin, sir, has earned five more.’  
And to this servant too he said, 
‘You, take charge of five cities.’  
Then the other servant came and said,
‘Sir, here is your gold coin;
I kept it stored away in a handkerchief, 
for I was afraid of you, because you are a demanding man; 
you take up what you did not lay down
and you harvest what you did not plant.’  
He said to him, 
‘With your own words I shall condemn you, 
you wicked servant.  
You knew I was a demanding man, 
taking up what I did not lay down 
and harvesting what I did not plant; 
why did you not put my money in a bank?  
Then on my return I would have collected it with interest.’  
And to those standing by he said, 
‘Take the gold coin from him 
and give it to the servant who has ten.’  
But they said to him, 
‘Sir, he has ten gold coins.’  
He replied, ‘I tell you, 
to everyone who has, more will be given, 
but from the one who has not, 
even what he has will be taken away.  
Now as for those enemies of mine 
who did not want me as their king, 
bring them here and slay them before me.’”  

After he had said this, 
he proceeded on his journey up to Jerusalem.*  

In pondering this parable, I have often considered how God calls us to use all of the gifts He has given us for His greater glory.  We are to use the gifts He has given us, our skills, our knowledge, our faith so we may better love Him and our neighbor.  We are to use these gifts He has bestowed upon us to further His Kingdom.  

Soon after I read these Gospel verses last week, they were presented to me further illuminated.  Someone I know who works with poor persons told me about a couple of interactions she had.  Hearing about her interactions, I have come to realize further how humility is valuable spiritual currency which can yield significant spiritual dividends.  

This worker had previously interacted countless times with a homeless woman who here I'll call "Irene."  It appears that Irene has mental health difficulties.  Weeks ago, Irene had defecated on the sidewalk in front of where this worker works; the worker ended up cleaning up the excrement.  A little over a week ago, Irene was yelling loudly out on the sidewalk, also in front of this worker's workplace.  People live, and thus sleep, near this location, so the worker informed Irene that she had to quiet down.  Last Wednesday, this worker told me that Irene had returned and had apologized to her for screaming so loudly so early in the morning.  

As I relate these interactions, I am reminded of how my mentor Larry, who decades ago founded the Redwood City Catholic Worker House, had said perhaps over a month ago that one does well if, in doing this type of work, one is not doing it to be thanked.  A person does well if he or she does it simply because he or she enjoys doing it regardless of whether or not he or she receives gratitude in return.  

You might ask how people can enjoy doing work which challenges them so much.  I am reminded of a story I have heard about the Missionaries of Charity, the religious sisters of the congregation founded by Saint Teresa of Calcutta.  

As I have heard the story, the sisters repeatedly went to a building where multiple people lived, in order to serve them.  At that building, when they knocked on a certain door, the occupant would never let them in.  One day when one of the sisters knocked on that particular door, and the dweller slightly opened the door, the sister literally got her foot in the doorway.  Since the resident was unable to close the door, the sister was able to get inside the apartment.  The sister discovered that the person had kept using the toilet even though it had become clogged.  Consequently, not only was the toilet full of excrement, but excrement had spilled over the rim of the toilet, and had further been spread throughout the apartment.  

As the sisters were shoveling excrement into containers so they could remove it from the apartment, the resident asked, "Do you still love me now?"  

A sister replied, "Even more."  

When a person has trouble caring for himself or herself, that person needs more love.  To be able to give that additional love, we need the humility to admit that we need God's help in everything.  We must pray to God to enable us to do everything we do, since we can do nothing without Him.  We need to ask God humbly for what we need so we can give others what they need.  

When we allow ourselves to be humbled, God gives us the grace and the strength to love others when we think we wouldn't be able to love them.  Whoever exalts himself will be humbled; but whoever humbles himself will be exalted.**  If we consent to become little, we can do great things.  If we agree to stoop down to help those who cannot help themselves, God will raise us up to be able to do the little yet great tasks of helping those who are little.  They are little in the eyes of the world, yet they are precious in the sight of God.  

One who is humble seems powerless in the sight of the world, but is favored by God.  God opposes the proud but accords his favor to the humble.***  By the grace of God, you can become more than you ever could be otherwise.  Through the grace and strength of God, you become more empowered than you ever would be otherwise.  Acting through that grace and strength now, in this lifetime, you will be greatly empowered.  And in the next life you will reap the rewards of the investment of the humility which you accept now.  

* Luke 19:11-28 
** Matthew 23:12; Luke 14:11; Luke 18:14 
*** 1 Peter 5:5 

Welcoming The Stranger

Yesterday I attended Mass at 7:30 a.m. here in Redwood City.  When I was on my way home from the church, I witnessed an interaction which keeps recurring in my memory.  As I recall it, into my mind also has been echoing when Jesus said 

When the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the angels with Him, He will sit upon His glorious throne, and all the nations will be assembled before Him.  And He will separate them one from another, as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats.  He will place the sheep on His right and the goats on His left.  

Then the King will say to those on His right, 'Come, you who are blessed by My Father.  Inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.  For I was . . . a stranger and you welcomed Me[.]'  

Then the righteous will answer Him and say, 'Lord . . . When did we see You a stranger and welcome You?'  

And the King will say to them in reply, 'Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of Mine, you did for Me.'*  

These verses have been reverberating in my mind since I saw a particular interaction as I was on my way back from Mass.  Someone walked up to a middle-aged Hispanic woman who was rather plainly dressed in clothes which did not look new.  In a heavy accent, in few words, in incomplete sentences, she told him that she is not originally from the U.S.  He replied, "You are welcome here."  She responded, "Thank you."  

* Matthew 25:31-35, 37, 38, 40  

Caller Not Available

Here at the Catholic Worker House, we've got caller ID on our landline phone.  When someone calls our house phone, on our phone we see the number calling, and we also see the name of the person who's calling.  

Today one of the times the phone rang, the phone didn't identify who the caller was.  Instead of seeing a name, the caller ID indicated that the identity of the caller was "Not Available."  When I answered the phone on that particular call, no one was there, as I should have expected.  The person was not available to speak with me.  

Thanks For Serving

As you probably have been well aware, today is Veterans' Day.  Today I called a particular veteran I know.  

Over the years, he and I have had some rather contentious and heated political discussions.  He and I agree right on target on certain issues, sometimes for the same reasons.  On other matters we share similar concerns but voice those concerns differently in how we vote.  On still other political questions we are diametrically opposed in our views, opinions which each of us vehemently hold.  

We had a lovely and warm conversation.  He thanked me for calling him and wishing him a Happy Veterans' Day and thanking him for serving.  

During the course of the conversation, he caused me to realize how he and I have influenced each other over the years.  He helped me to see how we have led each other to shift our beliefs and behavior.  

He shared with me how he walked into various stores today and was offered complimentary food and beverages because he is a veteran.  As he shared his day with me, and how he was honored because of his service as a veteran, I recalled a homeless vet I know, who I'll call "Ken."  I mentioned to him this homeless vet Ken who has been struggling.  I broke down into tears as I related over the phone how Ken had said some things about himself which troubled me.  

During our phone conversation today, I was comforted by this vet I had called.  He said very little in response when I shared about Ken, but he didn't need to say much.  He just gently soothed me as he listened.  

Later, after we got off the phone, as I was out and about, I crossed paths with Ken.  It had been longer than usual since I had last seen him.  It was good to see him, and I told him so.  

Ken recalled a day about a week ago when he was upset.  I was sitting with him as he was voicing some frustrations he had.  I was saying almost nothing.  At the time, I thought that I was doing little good.  It didn't seem I was doing, or that I could do, much, if anything at all, to help Ken.  Yet today Ken spoke of that day and said that he was grateful for my help that day.  

How can we make a difficult situation better?  How can we help people who are struggling?  Show up.  Listen.  Be there.  Be a friend.  Give them love.  

Do You Give?

Recently I enjoyed hearing about the following interaction so much that I've been eager to share it here.  

Someone I know showed up at a certain address to give someone some food.  Upon arriving at the apartment complex, the person delivering the food encountered a boy who was perhaps eight or nine years old.  The boy asked the person bringing the food, "Are you a giver?"  

The person carrying the food was startled by the boy's bold directness, unabashed curiosity, apparent innocence and implicit encouragement of people trying to love others.  After recovering from the unexpected question, the person responded to the boy, "Yes, I am."  

The boy said, "Cool."  

The person handing over the food said, "Yeah... when I do it, it makes me feel good."  

Do Your Best

Today is ripe for comment.  I am deliberately writing today.

As you process the events of the day, consider that you are not responsible for others' actions.  However, each of us is responsible for our own actions.  In the end, once we have passed away, all we will have will be the consequences of our own actions.  Each of us will have to answer for how we, as individuals, have chosen to act.  So make choices now which will bear good fruit both in this lifetime as well as in the next.

Mohandas Gandhi explained, "You must be the change you wish to see in the world."  If you are disturbed by something which has happened, then do something.  Do what you think needs to be done.  Be what you feel the world needs.  Whatever you choose to do, do your best.  In his book "The Four Agreements," Don Miguel Ruiz delineates this rule as how we are called to live our lives.  God realizes that we're not going to perform perfectly; God just asks that we do our best.

In addition to doing our spiritual duty by doing our best, it has been shown that people derive psychological benefits from choosing to take action.  When we ruminate, when we overthink about our problems, we tend to reinforce whatever degree of depression we tend to feel over the dilemma.  However, when we distract ourselves, or refocus our attention onto other matters, we tend to improve our mood.  Also, when we are more active, getting up and being mobile, we make it more likely we'll feel better.  Yet when we take a more passive, that is, sedentary, approach, we'll experience less of a lift in our mood.*

So in the midst of processing the circumstances of today, I have found that I have felt better today as I have decided to get out and take action.  Historically over the course of my life I have found this to be true as well.  There are specific moments I recall when I was an attorney, when I was feeling down.  At those points, when I reached out to help educate someone about the law, I felt better than I did before I did so.  Conversely, those who knew me in my adolescence knew me to be a rather depressed person.  That was back when I didn't get out and take much action, certainly far less than I have been taking over the last half dozen years.  Thus I recommend being deliberately active and moving to be the force you think the world needs.  In light of recent events, I don't mean to sound dismissive of how some people may feel right now.  However, what I can say for certain is that this approach has repeatedly worked for me over the course of my life, in stark contrast to when I have chosen not to follow it.

Today once again I witnessed the truth of this approach.  Someone I know went today and brought some food to someone who lives close by.  As she took the food, she smiled and expressed gratitude for receiving the food.  The giver expressed feeling better after handing the food to her, having had a desire to take immediate concrete steps to try to be generous amidst witnessing a perceived selfishness and greed by some in our society.

The recipient of the food too shared about an important lesson she learned yet again.  In that interaction in which she received the food, she shared about how she recently was awarded custody of her son.  In speaking with the person bringing the food to her, she explained the state of her mind, heart and soul as she had been pondering her quest to be granted custody of her son.  She said that she decided to turn it over to God.  She added that God took care of it for her.

In light of this message of relying on God, which inevitably leads one to pray, here I am led to another important point, which always applies.  However, the danger of succumbing to this particular trap is especially perilous when one feels that one is helpless, and that all is hopeless.  If you pray, the worst possible thing you could possibly do would be to stop praying.  When you are in spiritual darkness, you have the greatest need to pray.  Saint Paul exhorted us, "Pray without ceasing."**

Beyond praying always, Saint Paul also urged us, "Rejoice always."***  He also told us, "In all circumstances give thanks."****  At this point, you might be thinking something like, "Doug, I was humoring you up to now, but I can't swallow this.  When inflammatory, incendiary, divisive statements are made which demean and degrade people, and then such rhetoric is implicitly approved by many, you expect me to be joyous and to thank God?"  If we truly love others, then we will be disturbed when people are debased and disrespected.  God calls us not to be pleased and joyous because others are being mistreated, but to be grateful and joyous to Him that we are presented with the circumstances in which we currently find ourselves.  Are we grateful to God for the opportunity which God has given to us?  Anything except sin can sanctify us, that is, bring us closer to God, if only we respond in the right way.  I'm not trying to suggest that we're presented with an easy task here; I readily admit this is very difficult work.  Anything worth achieving comes at great personal cost.  The greater the worth, the more it costs.  If you believe this maxim as it relates to personal wealth, why reject this axiom when applied to spiritual progress?

Dorothy Day, who co-founded the Catholic Worker movement with Peter Maurin, said, "Love is the only solution."  If we're really serious about living a life of love, then the question is presented to each and every one of us, how far are we going to go to try to love?  Jesus told us, " No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends."*****  Jesus did exactly that.  He died on the cross for us, obedient even to the point of death, allowing Himself to be humbled even more than He already had been humbled.******  He also instructed us, "Love one another as I love you."*******  We are called to die to ourselves so we can better serve others.  We are called to die to our own egos, so as to be better able to love our neighbor.  When we strive for our egos to die, we can go beyond ourselves.  Then, instead of staying inside ourselves, we can go further, to try to help someone who may have hurt us.  Then, by the grace of God, it becomes possible to do what had previously seemed impossible to do.

In light of the grace of God, it becomes clearer how Jesus directed us

"You have heard that it was said,
'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.'  
But I say to you, Love your enemies, 
and pray for those who persecute you,
that you may be children of your Heavenly Father,
for He makes His Sun rise on the bad and the good,
and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust.
For if you love those who love you, 
what recompense will you have?
Do not the tax collectors do the same?
And if you greet your brothers only, what is unusual about that?
Do not the pagans do the same?
So be perfect, just as your Heavenly Father is perfect."********

In the end, the goal is love.  To love as God loves is to love all God created.  God loves everyone He created.  He may be displeased with certain persons at certain times.  However, God still loves those persons.  While God is loving all of the people He created, we are to strive to love our neighbor too.

We are to love our neighbor despite how he or she may act in ways we don't approve, and which we might even find repellent or abhorrent.  But although we might find someone else's choices distressing, we should not worry about what the future holds and how it will be affected by others' decisions.  Jesus instructed us, "Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.  Sufficient for a day is its own evil."*********

Don't worry about other people, what they say, or what they do.  We never were responsible for their actions; we never will be.  In the end, we won't be asked to answer for their behavior.

In the end, we will be called to account for our own actions.  So despite the events of the day, the question remains: what are you going to do?

* Here is an excellent example of how I have continued to benefit from my Bachelor's degree in Psychology.  While an undergraduate student, I learned that distracting, or refocusing, oneself tends to be more effective in remediating depression than ruminating.  In learning about the same psychological studies, I learned that activity tends to be more effective than passivity in remediating depression.  Prof. Jannay Morrow, one of my mentors while I was a Psychology major, had previously conducted these studies.
** 1 Thessalonians 5:17
*** 1 Thessalonians 5:16
**** 1 Thessalonians 5:18
***** John 15:13
****** Philippians 2:8
******* John 15:12
******** Matthew 5:43-48
********* Matthew 6:34 

Love To Give

Recently in a Gospel reading for the day, we heard of Jesus telling a parable:  

Jesus said to his disciples, “A rich man had a steward
who was reported to him for squandering his property.  
He summoned him and said,
‘What is this I hear about you?  
Prepare a full account of your stewardship,
because you can no longer be my steward.’  
The steward said to himself, ‘What shall I do,
now that my master is taking the position of steward away 
from me?  
I am not strong enough to dig and I am ashamed to beg.  
I know what I shall do so that,
when I am removed from the stewardship,
they may welcome me into their homes.’  
He called in his master’s debtors one by one.  
To the first he said, ‘How much do you owe my master?’  
He replied, ‘One hundred measures of olive oil.’  
He said to him, ‘Here is your promissory note.  
Sit down and quickly write one for fifty.’  
Then to another he said, ‘And you, how much do you owe?’  
He replied, ‘One hundred measures of wheat.’  
He said to him, ‘Here is your promissory note; 
write one for eighty.’  
And the master commended that dishonest steward for 
acting prudently.  
For the children of this world
are more prudent in dealing with their own generation
than the children of light.”*

For a while I didn't understand this parable.  Then I read some insightful commentary in the Jerusalem Bible which helped me to grasp part of its meaning.  Typically a steward would receive a commission on the payment of goods to his master.  Presumably the steward's original commission was fifty on the olive oil, and twenty on the wheat.  In directing the master's debtors to write new promissory notes for fifty and eighty, presumably the steward was simply foregoing his original commissions.**    

The master did not commend the dishonest steward for his dishonesty.  The master praised him for his astuteness: the steward, in forfeiting his commissions, made friends with the master's debtors.  

The steward was giving up payments he would have received so the master's debtors would welcome him into their homes.  The steward was acting in a self-serving way.  

Yet we too can choose to let go of things which we feel we are owed, yet for the betterment of others.  We can live more simply in order to help others to live.  When I reflect on these verses, I ask myself, "What can I give up that I feel like I have coming to me?  Instead of keeping something for myself because I feel like I'm entitled to it, can I redirect those funds, that property to some better use than keeping it for myself?"  

Unlike the steward's self-serving motives, we can decide to give to others without any expectation of a return on our gifts.  We can give while expecting not to receive.  

To give is to love.  To give without any hope of receiving in return is to love without conditions.  To give while not expecting anything in return is selflessly giving, giving more of oneself.  

To give is to feel joy.  To give to people who can't give back can be to feel great joy.  In giving to those who can't reciprocate, we can feel a deep joy, because a deep love is expressed.  

* Luke 16:1-8 
** Jerusalem Bible, Bantam Doubleday Dell Publishing Group, Inc. (New York, 1990), p. 1717, note "b" to Luke 16:8 

Opening Our Hearts

This morning a particular homeless man again showed up here at the Catholic Worker House.  I'll call him "Ben."  Whenever we see Ben, we are reminded, by what he does and says, that he is addicted to a certain substance.  Today as usual he was under the influence of this substance.  

He was distraught.  He shared with me that sometimes he gets very angry at himself.  He said he knows that he needs to work on accepting himself.  

I gently said to him, "You have to love yourself."  

He softly replied, "I know."  

Don't crucify yourself.  When you crucify yourself, you crucify Jesus.  Jesus already died for our sins.  When you choose not to love, you sin.  When you decide not to love, you separate yourself from God.  When you refuse to love yourself, you separate yourself from God.  

God wants us to return to Him, but to do so we must accept ourselves.  To love ourselves, we have to open our own hearts to acknowledge our own self-worth.  

When we close our hearts to others, we close our hearts to God.  When we close our hearts on ourselves--when we refuse to become who we have always been meant to be, when we refuse to try our best--we close our hearts to God.  

When we close our hearts to God, we refuse joy.  When we close our hearts to each other, we refuse joy, since we are choosing not to love our neighbor, which God created us to do.  When we close our hearts by not loving ourselves, we are deciding not to be joyful, since we are refusing to be loving human beings, who God created us to be.  

God wants us to be happy.  God wants us to love Him with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind, and with all our strength,* and to love each other as ourselves,** and therefore to love ourselves.  

God loves us.  God loves us more than we can comprehend.  To be able to love God, we must love ourselves.  

God wants us to love each other.  To be able to love others, we must love ourselves.  

God wants us to love ourselves.  

* Mark 12:30; Deuteronomy 6:5  
** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14