Love Giving All

Love is costly.  God showed us what we pay when we truly and fully and deeply love.  God the Father so loved us that He sent His only Son to us.*  Jesus showed us how much He was willing to give to us: He emptied Himself; He became a slave** to love, to God who is love,*** to the will of Our Heavenly Father.  He loved the will of Our Heavenly Father so much that He obediently humbled Himself even unto death, and even death on a cross.****  

When we really love, we give completely of ourselves.  If we actually love, we give all that we have and are.  If we totally love, we think, speak and act like Jesus.  

* John 3:16 
** Philippians 2:7 
*** 1 John 4:8,16 
**** Philippians 2:8 

Lovingly Choose Life

Earlier this week a homeless woman who I'll call "Katarina" told me that a homeless man who I'll call "Zack" had brutalized her.  Soon after she had shared this raw wound with me, again we crossed paths.  Then Katarina told me that Zack had come to her, repentant and regretful.  Zack, a tall, burly, muscular man, had stood before Katarina, his lip quivering with remorse, and had apologized to her for how he had grossly mistreated her.  

God can soften hardened hearts.  God can transform brutality into repentance.  

Just as God can lead us sinners to repent by guiding us through the Holy Spirit to forsake our hurtful behavior, so God can heal our wounded neighbor.  I have already seen how Katarina has been healing, since she has been forgiving Zack.  We heal ourselves and our neighbor when we forgive our neighbor.  

To heal ourselves, also we must forgive ourselves.  To heal ourselves, we must love ourselves.  So that we may be restored to health, sometimes we must recognize that we are not responsible for how others have harmed us.  Some people who have been abused blame themselves.  We are not responsible for others' actions.  However, we are responsible for how we respond to others' actions.  God calls us to love ourselves, such that we do not blame ourselves for what others do to us.  

God calls us not to perpetuate the suffering that others have inflicted on us by abusing ourselves.  God calls us not to cling to our pain.  God calls us to let go of our anguish by not fostering it through inaccurate images of ourselves.  

God calls us not to recreate our torment by continuing to live in our pain.  Some people who have been traumatized choose to relive the harrowing experience by putting themselves back into the same situation with the same person who abused them.  Rather than live in past abuse which binds us to death, God calls us to new life.  Jesus has told us that He came so that we might have new life, and have it to the full.*  

We find life in Jesus, who is The Way to The Life, which is The Truth.**  We find life when we love others as Jesus loves us.***  
God calls us to love our neighbor as ourselves.****  Since God calls us to love others, we must also love ourselves.  We must accord ourselves the same love we bestow upon others.  We owe ourselves a duty to love ourselves.  

If we love ourselves, we choose life.*****  As we love ourselves, we move toward having life to the full.  When we love ourselves, we move toward God.  In loving ourselves, we start to become who God has always meant us to be.  

As we become who God has always intended us to be, at the same time we are praising God and glorifying Him.  When we open our hearts to who God made us to be, we acknowledge His rightful place as our Creator, and thus come to love our Heavenly Father with all our heart, with all our mind, with all our soul, and with all our strength.******  

As we become who God made us to be, we draw back home to God and toward Heaven.  Let us love ourselves, our neighbor, and thus become who God created us to be.  Amen.  

* John 10:10 
** John 14:6 
*** John 13:34; John 15:12 
**** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
***** Deuteronomy 30:19 
****** Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27 

Imitating Loving Friends

Today I attended the funeral of a dear friend who I have called “Uncle.”  Uncle was a poetic and literate, religious, warm and hospitable, determined and committed, nurturing and loving soul.  I fondly remember him and treasure him in my heart for the admirable qualities he displayed.  

In what we value in our friends, we are presented with opportunities to become like them.  Our friends invite us to emulate them.  

I can honor Uncle not just by pondering what I appreciated about him.  Keeping in mind his faith, love of learning, welcoming nature, tenacity and compassion, I can strive to demonstrate these qualities as I try to love my neighbor as myself,* as Jesus instructed, and as Uncle aimed to do.  

In imitating our friends, including as we look back on our friends’ lives and recall what we appreciate about them, we can come to realize that death truly is a life-giving experience.  In feeling nourished by the consideration of the life of our dearly departed friend, we can feel joy in the midst of our sorrow.  

Uncle may have moved on to the next life, but he has left us with the gift of how he lived his life.  As I consider his death, I am moved to find new life in how he wholeheartedly embraced what God called him to do here on this earth.  

Of course we weep when our family members and friends pass on from this life to the next.  Yet in remembering how our deceased friends have lived, we can consider how we would like to live like them since they brought us joy.  In imitating our dearly departed friends, we can thus similarly bring others joy.  

Uncle was a great friend, and brought me much joy.  Realizing the joy he brought to me, I feel called to look at how he lived and how he loved.  

If we let the love of our departed friends live on in us, our friends can continue to live through us.  We can honor our deceased friends by helping them to live on through us.  

Friends live in our hearts.  They live in our hearts while they are still living in this life, and they still live in our hearts once they have passed on to the next life.  Our friends live in our hearts during our lives on this earth since we have welcomed them into our hearts.  If they remain in our hearts, they live on in our hearts once they have passed on to the next life.  

Let us consider how our friends have loved us.  Let us feel the joy our friends bring us.  A person is a friend if he helps you to love God, your neighbor and yourself.  

And so, looking back on the life of Uncle, I see a great friend.  He helped me to love God and my neighbor and myself.  And so I choose to imitate him.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Truly Loving Life

If we sow love, we reap joy.  Our friends bring us joy as they love us.  We bring each other joy as we let God love others through us.  

When we reach the final stretch of our lives, we can look back on our lives either sorrowful or rejoicing.  Thus we do well to imagine, much like Saint Ignatius of Loyola suggests, being near the end of our life and looking back on the choices we are making today.  We can envision on how we will feel in the last days of our lives about the decisions we are making today.  

Similarly, we can find consolation at the end of a friend’s life if we consider what kind of life our friend has lived.  At the end of our friend’s life, we can look back on his life and feel joy at the love he has chosen to be manifested in his life.  In focusing on the love we have received from our friend, we can feel gratitude for the gifts God has given us through our friend.  Thus as a friend’s life draws to an end, we can celebrate, out of deep gratitude and appreciation for the numerous gifts God has given us through our friend who is about to move onward.  

We can realize that death is an opportunity to be transformed.  Certainly we mourn the passing of our friends.  Yet as we weep, we implicitly admit we have received the gift of love from God through our neighbor.  

Thus in the midst of pain and suffering, we are presented with opportunities to thank God for the love we have felt.  Even amidst anguish and torment, we are given chances to be grateful to God.  

Certainly we are deeply disturbed when those who witness to the truth suffer.  Yet in their witness to the truth, in how they have lived their lives, they have encouraged us, and have helped us to feel the joy which comes from loving and from welcoming the truth into our hearts.  

And so on this particular date on the liturgical calendar in the Catholic Church we feel distressed as well as encouraged.  Today in the Catholic Church we especially recall the death of Saint John the Baptist.  Saint John the Baptist had lived a life of witnessing to the truth.  He had heralded the coming of Jesus,* who is The Truth.**  Saint John the Baptist had encouraged people to reform their lives,*** and so welcome The Truth, The Word that Jesus was speaking and living.  Saint John the Baptist was also not afraid to proclaim the truth to those in power.  He had told King Herod that it was wrong for him to be with Herodias, who was his brother’s wife.  Since Herodias did not want to hear that moral truth, she told her daughter Salome to ask King Herod for the head of Saint John the Baptist on a plate, which Salome requested.  Saint John the Baptist was beheaded for witnessing to the truth.****    

I am disturbed when I go back and read of how Saint John the Baptist was decapitated for proclaiming the truth to a leader.  Yet death need not be reason only for sadness.  When someone dies for declaring the truth, such a person has lit a candle of truth.  When a person dies, the statement of the truth of the person’s life has been made.  Life may have departed from that body, but the statement of truth which that person has made, and the expression of love which that person has lived, cannot be extinguished.  The truth and the love that person has shown lives on in our hearts.  

And so, in the face of impending death, we are led to consider a profound question: what kind of a life has someone lived?  As this life ends, we are faced with the question of how the gift of life from God has been used by the person who is going to meet God who gave the person that life.    

In considering the type of life that Saint John the Baptist lived, we see that he witnessed to the truth.  He fiercely loved the truth.  He loved the truth more than his own life.  He was not afraid to proclaim the truth, and he was thrown in prison for doing so,***** and then murdered for doing so.  He kept witnessing to the truth all the way to the end of his life, and witnessed to the truth even at the cost of his own life.  

Although probably we will not be imprisoned or executed for stating the truth, nevertheless we are presented with opportunities to speak the truth tenaciously and to love fiercely, not capitulating to temptations to despair.  I have been blessed with a marvelous model who has demonstrated loyalty to the truth and to the love inherent in the truth.  I have written before of my older friend who I address as “Uncle.”  Through his words and actions, he has stayed on the course God has laid out before him, witnessing to the truth of who and what God has called him to be.  I have written before of how Uncle had a stroke nearly a year ago.  For almost a year, Uncle has been unable to move as he used to move, and has not been able to speak.  Yet he has patiently stayed the course laid out before him.  He has continued to demonstrate the truth of how God calls us to face the challenges which unfold in our lives.  Uncle has bravely endured the suffering he has felt, doing as God calls him to do until death.  

He has kept showing his family how to encounter challenges they face.  I think of someone I know who has suffered multiple major setbacks over the course of the year which has just passed.  If Uncle could speak, perhaps he would say to this other courageous soul, “I am right here with you, suffering along with you.  You and I are sharing pain together.”  Uncle has been encouraging others around him.  He has been demonstrating to them how to persist in the face of adversity.  To the end, Uncle is embracing the task of teaching his family and friends how to welcome the duty of this present moment, as Jean-Pierre de Caussade described.  All the way to the end, Uncle is showing those he loves how to love, by embracing the duty set before him.  

If our nearly departed friend has lived loving God and his neighbor, at the end of our friend’s life, we can rejoice with our friend, grateful for the love God has shown us through our friend.  Looking back on choices well made, through which a person has witnessed to the truth that we are called to love God and our neighbor in every little choice we make in every moment, then we feel the joy that loving others brings to us and to others.  

When we welcome this duty which God sets before us, we welcome God into our hearts.  As we welcome God into our hearts, we welcome love into our hearts.  Opening our hearts to God, God fills us with the love we need to do His will.******  Filled with the love of God, we are enabled through His grace to carry out His will.  Overflowing with the love of God, we can witness to the truth, no matter what the cost.  Empowered with His grace, we can endure whatever hardships we encounter.  With the love of God, we can suffer through our own torment so as to help others weather their own storms.  Through the love of God, we can love as God has loved us.  Amen.  

* Matthew 3:11; Mark 1:7; Luke 3:16; John 1:26-27

** John 14:6 

*** Matthew 3:1-2,8; Mark 1:4; Luke 3:3,8 

**** Matthew 14:3-10; Mark 6:17-28; Luke 3:19

***** Matthew 14:3; Mark 6:17; Luke 3:19-20 
****** Romans 5:5 

Dying For Others

July 1941.  Auschwitz.  A prisoner escapes.  In retribution, the Nazis condemn ten prisoners to death.  At roll call, they announce the names of the persons who they will send to their deaths.  One of the ten sentenced to death, Francis Gajowniczek, cries out that he has a wife and children.  Another inmate there at roll call, a Franciscan priest named Maximilian Kolbe, steps forward and says he would like to take the place of Gajowniczek.  

The Nazis agreed to the switch.  Kolbe and the other nine were subjected to forced starvation.  Despite dehydration and starvation, after two weeks Kolbe still had not died.  Kolbe was executed by a lethal injection on August 14, 1941.  

Gajowniczek later described how he could only thank Kolbe with his eyes.  He added that it was the first and the last time such an occurrence transpired at Auschwitz.  

Beauty and warmth and compassion can spring forth in the midst of horror and atrocities.  Kindness can be shown when brutality is all around us.  Love can be offered in reply to hate.  

Often we cannot control what happens to us.  However, we can always choose how we respond. When we are convinced that our freedom has been taken away from us, we can realize that we still have the free will that God has given to us because He loves us so much.  When we ask in disbelief and misunderstanding how God can allow such pain and suffering in the world, we can realize that God loves us so much that He gives us our free will.  God loves us so much that He will not force us.  God loves us so much that He lets us make our own decisions.  

Today as we celebrate the feast day of Saint Maximilian Kolbe, we can be led through the remembrance of the bravery of this saint to carefully consider our own choices.  We might never be given the chance to sacrifice ourselves courageously by physically dying for someone else.  However, in every fleeting moment of time, we can decide to die to ourselves so we can live for our neighbor in little ways.  Over and over again, we can put our neighbor before ourselves as we perform little acts of love for others, as Saint Therese of Lisieux did in her little way.  In every little action we do, we can decide to give away our lives for our neighbor, and thus save the life of our neighbor.  In each and every moment, we can choose to love our neighbor as ourselves,* as Jesus taught us to do.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Whom You Seek

Who do we want in our lives?  Who are we looking for?  In the answers to these questions, we define ourselves.  You show who you are by the company you keep.  You make clear your identity through the people you want to have around you.  Through who you welcome into your heart, you not only fix your relationship with your neighbor, but also your relationship with God.  

Today as we celebrate the feast day of Saint Mary Magdalene, through her example, we are reminded that we show who we are by who we seek.  In today's Gospel reading we are told of how she went looking for Jesus after He had been buried.  There we hear that 

On the first day of the week,
Mary Magdalene came to the tomb early in the morning,
while it was still dark,
and saw the stone removed from the tomb.
So she ran and went to Simon Peter
and to the other disciple whom Jesus loved, and told them,
"They have taken the Lord from the tomb,
and we don't know where they put him." 

Mary stayed outside the tomb weeping.
And as she wept, she bent over into the tomb
and saw two angels in white sitting there,
one at the head and one at the feet
where the Body of Jesus had been.
And they said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?"
She said to them, "They have taken my Lord,
and I don't know where they laid him."
When she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus there,
but did not know it was Jesus.
Jesus said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?
Whom are you looking for?"
She thought it was the gardener and said to him,
"Sir, if you carried him away,
tell me where you laid him,
and I will take him."
Jesus said to her, "Mary!"
She turned and said to him in Hebrew,
"Rabbouni," which means Teacher.
Jesus said to her,
"Stop holding on to me, 
for I have not yet ascended to the Father.
But go to my brothers and tell them,
'I am going to my Father and your Father,
to my God and your God.'"
Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples,
"I have seen the Lord,"
and then reported what he told her.*   

Mary Magdalene saw that Jesus' tomb had been opened.  She not only ran to tell Saint Peter and the other disciple who Jesus loved, who was Saint John, but, since she sought Jesus, she returned to the tomb.  There she encountered Jesus.  Yet she did not realize she had once again been visited by Jesus.  Jesus comes to us.  Do we recognize Him?  

A homeless woman showed up at my doorstep yesterday.  Did I see Jesus in her?  Jesus has told us that whatever we do to the least of those among us, we do to Him.**  Whatever we do to the homeless person in front of us, we do to Jesus.  

We can become passionate about Jesus.  We can become so intent on finding God that we can fail to recognize Him when He is standing next to us.  Then Jesus, in the impoverished person before us, may ask us, "Who are you looking for?"  

Everyday we are presented with precious opportunities to love which are wrapped up with, which are inextricably intertwined with, our eternal destinies.  When we have gotten to the other side of death, then we will meet Jesus no longer in poor persons, but Jesus as Himself.  Then He will address us according to what we have done.  

If we have fed the hungry, given drink to the thirsty, welcomed the stranger, clothed the naked, cared for the ill, and visited those in prison,*** Jesus will bid us to inherit the Kingdom.****  If we have failed to perform these corporal works of mercy, Jesus will tell us to depart from Him.*****  For whatever we do to the least of those among us, we do to Him.  And whatever we fail to do to those who are the least among us, we fail to do to Him.******  

So, now, while we still have the chance to be merciful to our neighbor, especially those who are the least among us, do we recognize Jesus among us now, in the poor persons in front of us?  Do we seek Jesus in the impoverished person, in the homeless person, who is literally reaching toward us, asking us for just a little bit of food to ease the hunger pains crying out towards us?  

In whom we seek, we define ourselves.  For in whom we seek, we decide our eternal destinies.  In who we are looking for, we determine our relationship with God.  Let us turn toward God, by opening our hearts to love, by loving our neighbor, right now, right in front of us.  Amen.  

* John 20:1-2, 11-18
** Matthew 25:40 
*** Matthew 25:35-40 
**** Matthew 25:34 
***** Matthew 25:41 
****** Matthew 25:45 

Giving Up Ourselves

We are to give of ourselves.  We are to pour ourselves out for our neighbor.  Out of love for our neighbor, we are to die to ourselves so our neighbor can more fully live.  We are reminded of how we are called to such death and rebirth through how Jesus lived, died and rose from the dead for us.  In emulating and following Jesus, we are to model such love for each other.  I have seen a dear friend live out this love, throughout the whole time I have known him, and especially over the past year.  

Yesterday I visited this dear friend.  Years ago he asked me to address him as "Uncle," so here in this blog post I'll call him "Uncle."  Uncle is much older than I am.  He's the father of two friends of mine who were in college with me; I've known them for over twenty years.  Since we've been good friends for so long, years ago they introduced me to their father, who is Uncle.  
About nine months ago Uncle had a stroke.  He has been slowly recovering from this stroke: he cannot speak; he can move much less than he used to move.  He has been recuperating in long-term care facilities.  I have been struck by his tenacity and his determination.  Although he has faced significant challenges as he tries to regain his functioning, he has not been deterred.  

He has not given up.  He has kept trying to get better.  Although his body is broken, still he gives of himself.  

Jesus' body was broken for us.  Jesus gave of Himself for our sakes.  

Today we celebrate the Solemnity of the Body and Blood of Christ.  Today we especially honor how Jesus gave up His body and His blood for us.   

When Jesus celebrated the Last Supper with His disciples, He broke the bread and gave it to His disciples, telling them, "This is My Body, given for you."  With the cup of wine, He told them, "This is My Blood, poured out for you."  As He gave them the bread and the cup, He instructed His disciples, "Do this in memory of me."*  Thus we celebrate the Eucharist when we celebrate Mass.  

Jesus has told us to do as he has done.  Give yourself up for your neighbor.  

Uncle is still giving of himself for the sake of his children and grandchildren.  By facing physical pain and incapacitation with resolve and fortitude, he is showing his children and his grandchildren how to respond courageously to formidable challenges.  In how he stays his course as he bravely grapples with his physical challenges, he is continuing to teach his children and his grandchildren about persistence, a labor of love to be honored today on Father's Day, and everyday.  

Uncle is embracing the duty God has placed before him.  Yesterday when I saw Uncle, I read to him an excerpt from "The Sacrament of the Present Moment" by Jean-Pierre de Caussade, which I felt he would find inspiring.  In it, de Caussade asks us, 

Is not a picture painted on a canvas by the application of one stroke of the brush at a time?  Similarly the cruel chisel destroys a stone with each cut.  But what the stone suffers by repeated blows is no less the shape the mason is making of it.  And should a poor stone be asked, "What is happening to you?" it might reply, "Don't ask me.  All I know is that for my part there is nothing for me to know or do, only to remain steady under the hand of my Master and to love Him and suffer Him to work out my destiny.  It is for Him to know how to achieve this.  I know neither what is best and most perfect, and I suffer each cut of the chisel as though it were the best thing for me, even though, to tell the truth, each one is my idea of ruin, destruction and defacement.  But, ignoring all this, I rest contented with the present moment.  Thinking only of my duty to it, I submit to the work of this skillful Master without caring to know what it is."  

God calls us to the duty of the present moment.  God seeks to shape us through means we would not have chosen on our own.  God speaks to us in ways we don't expect.  

I think of Father Bruno, one of the Camaldolese monks I met at the hermitage in Big Sur, and how he found encouragement in his monastic vocation in a way some might see as unlikely, as described in the book "Adam: God's Beloved" by Henri Nouwen.  Once Father Bruno had stopped serving as prior, or head, of the monastic community in Big Sur, he took a sabbatical to help him to transition from holding authority to once again being a regular monk.  During his three months away from the hermitage, Father Bruno stayed at one of the L'Arche homes for disabled people founded by Jean Vanier.  While caring for a young intellectually disabled man named Adam at a L'Arche home, Father Bruno related how this disabled man, who essentially could not speak, was helping him to be a better monk.  Father Bruno explained that he had known that he "had to become empty for God, gradually letting go of thoughts, emotions, feelings and passions" that prevent deep communion with God.  Father Bruno described how silent Adam was helping him to delve into deeper solitude and thus deeper communion with God.  

We find encouragement in our relationship with God through people we don't expect, and through circumstances we don't expect.  God speaks to us both through pleasure and through pain, both of which can help us to welcome God into our hearts.  

When we encounter hardship, it might not seem like a blessing to us.  In the moment, all we see and feel is our own misery.  Yet we can come to realize that by pouring ourselves out for our neighbor, we can help our neighbor more fully live.  If we embrace our suffering, we are well-positioned to love our neighbor.  If we consciously embrace our afflictions so that others can live better, we can witness our pain being transformed into a sacrifice of love.  A sacrifice lovingly given can bear beautiful fruit, which can be seen in how others come to love better through the example provided to them.  

Once we see that our suffering can become an occasion for us to better love our neighbor, we come to see that God allows us to encounter adversity for our own good.  And of course God allows us pleasure for our comfort.  And so we can come to see God in all things.  We can come to welcome ordeals once we see that God is working all for our good, if we just love Him.**  

Realizing that God works all for the good of those who love Him, we come to thank God always.***  Seeing that God is always loving us, since God is love,**** we come to ever more open our hearts to God.  Welcoming God as love, we welcome whatever God sends to us.  Out of love, we welcome God into our hearts.  Amen.  

* Matthew 26:26-28; Mark 14:22-24; Luke 22:19-20; 
1 Corinthians 11:23-25 

** Romans 8:28 

*** 1 Thessalonians 5:18 

**** 1 John 4:8,16 

Littleness Bears Fruit

This morning I looked out my window here at the Catholic Worker House and saw Jacqueline walking down the sidewalk.  She's a homeless woman who came here to the Catholic Worker House a few weeks ago.  

That night nearly a month ago, the doorbell rang.  When a Catholic Worker opened the door, there stood Jacqueline.  She explained that she was by herself.  And then, she added, as she burst into tears and started sobbing, that she didn't know where she was going to stay for the night.  

Although the Catholic Worker answering the door felt like she couldn't do anything to help, she figured she could at least try to calm Jacqueline.  She suggested to Jacqueline that she sit down on our front porch and take some time to rest.  She told Jacqueline that when another Catholic Worker got home in a little while, we could put our heads together to figure out how we could help her.  

Jacqueline sat down on the porch and began to eat something someone had given to her.  Later that evening, I went out to the porch to check on Jacqueline, but she was gone.  

A couple of days ago, when I was out and about here in Redwood City, I saw a woman walking through a parking lot.  Wanting to be friendly, I greeted her.  

She came over to me and her face lit up.  She revealed to me that she was the one who had been so distraught that night on the porch.  Somehow I hadn't recognized her.  Jacqueline expressed much appreciation and gratitude, saying that she had felt supported during her time in need by that Catholic Worker who had answered the door that night.  She updated me on her life, relating that since then, she has started living in a homeless shelter here in Redwood City.  She was beaming as she happily told me about how she is doing.  

Now Jacqueline is finding shelter and security.  That night a few weeks ago, it seemed she was inconsolable, yet in the midst of her trial, she was finding comfort and care: it had seemed that there was little or nothing that could be done to help, yet that Catholic Worker had been soothing her more than initially was apparent.  

There in the little scraps of time which that Catholic Worker had had with her, in the present moment with her, were tiny chances to perform little actions of love for her.  We can brush off opportunities to give little gifts of love to others, since in the duty of the present moment God might be calling us to such minuscule acts of love that we conclude such opportunities are too insignificant to bear substantial fruit.  

Yet in every little chance we get to love our neighbor as ourselves* as Jesus taught us, we are given a chance to plant a little mustard seed for the sake of the Kingdom of God.  If we seize every small chance we have to love our neighbor, if we plant every such tiny little seed of love, much fruit can result for the Kingdom of God.  

Jesus told us if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we could move mountains.**  If we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we will have confidence in God's ability to bear much fruit through our little actions of love in each moment, in every tiny scrap of time.  If we have faith, we can value little fragments of time which "The Cloud of Unknowing" describes, and we can be more attentive to "The Sacrament of the Present Moment" as Jean-Pierre de Caussade urges, and can be well-positioned to perform little acts of love, as Saint Therese of Lisieux related.  

Little acts of love are like little grains of wheat: as long as they remain unused and unplanted, they have little value.  Just as little grains of wheat yield a harvest once they are planted, so it is that little loving actions only yield much spiritual fruit once they are actually carried out.  

Jesus told us that unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains a single grain; yet if it dies, it yields a rich harvest.***  If we but die to the inaccurate assumptions we have about what God calls us to do in the present moment, and instead embrace the person standing in front of us, the microscopic seeds of our miniature acts can bear much fruit in the heart of our neighbor.  Having faith in this approach to life, we can let God move mountains through us, when it seems we are only picking up a grain of sand.  With faith, we become more comfortable with dying to our own ideas about what we are to do, and are freed up to love our neighbor in his time of need.  

When we love our neighbor in his time of need, his fear about surviving dies.  When we love our neighbor, we let God love our neighbor through us, and our neighbor is reassured that he is loved by God and by us, and is given the strength from God to carry onward.  When our neighbor lets the fear in her die, she can live to grow into the person God has always intended her to be; she can see who she is and what she is to do.  

Dying to his fear, our neighbor rises from the death that fear had caused.  Then when we see our neighbor risen from the dead, we do not recognize our neighbor.****  He has grown into the new person God has always intended him to be.  He is living out the new life God has meant for him to live.  We foster and nourish this new life when we die to our misconceptions of what we believe we are being called to do in the current moment.  

By embracing the duty of the present moment, to love our neighbor in every little instant of time, we realize that every small act of love for another can bear much fruit in the heart of that person.  By letting God love others through us, others have the love they need to become who God has always intended them to be.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
** Matthew 17:20; Matthew 21:21; Mark 11:23 
*** John 12:24 
**** Luke 24:16; John 21:4 

Plainly Loving Language

When we speak with someone, there is much left unsaid.  And yet we do not want to have regrets.  We want to express what is in our hearts that is longing to be released.  

If we but listen, we can hear the love of God that is knocking at the door of our hearts.  If we have let that love into our hearts,* that love in us is meant to be let out.  God calls us to love our neighbor** through our actions, and to speak plainly the language of love with our neighbor, whether they are rich or poor, whether they are luxuriously living in a mansion, or are huddled and shivering in sleeping bags and tents in the bushes.  
I have been trying to demonstrate to the homeless folks I love here in Redwood City that there is a deeper meaning to interactions they have with people who help them.  Recently I have told certain homeless friends of mine that when they receive food from people who aim to help them, it is not just about food.  Really, I have said to them, I have been trying to tell you that I love you.  

We wish to show you that you are worthy of respect.  You are receiving this love God is giving you through me because God loves you.  

And so when I have spoken so directly to my homeless friends who I so cherish, I feel as if I could say to them, that the time has come when I am no longer communicating with you in figures of speech, much like what Jesus said to His disciples just before His passion and death.***  It seems as if I could tell these dear homeless brothers and sisters of mine that now I am no longer just speaking with you through the metaphors of my actions.  Now I am speaking with you plainly.****  Finally I am talking with you in the plain language of love. 

Throughout much of His public ministry, Jesus spoke in parables and figures of speech.  Then on Maundy Thursday, He sat down with His disciples for the Last Supper, just before He was handed over to be condemned to death.*****  In that meal that night with His disciples, they saw a prefiguring of His sacrifice on the Cross.  While His disciples sat down to a meal of bread and wine, they received much more than food and drink; in the Eucharist, we receive nourishment of love from Jesus.  Having shown us on the night of the Last Supper how we are to celebrate the Eucharist, Jesus was about to die on Cross, and do what He had just said He was about to do.  He was showing them the greatest love one can have for one's friends, as He laid down His life for His friends.******  

When we try to show the greatest love we can have for our neighbor, when we die to ourselves, we live for our neighbor.  When we forget who we are, who society thinks we are supposed to be, when we disregard the message from society that we are to shun our brothers and sisters who are outcasts, then we can die to the disordered desires and hurtful ideas and selfish tendencies we have, so we can embrace our needy neighbor, and thus live for our neighbor.  

Once Jesus had spoken plainly to His disciples, just before He was handed over to be crucified, He told them that He did not have much more to say to them.*******  He had spoken The Truth honestly and openly with them, and thus there was not much else for Him to say.  

In telling these treasured homeless friends of mine that in trying to care for them, I am truly trying to tell them that I deeply love them, I have spoken plainly to them.  I have said what I really have to say to these homeless friends I so love.  And so I don't have much else to say.  

And so in a certain sense, I would be content if this were to be last blog entry I were ever to write.  Since this is the core of the message I feel that God brought me into the world to declare to my brothers and my sisters, I feel I have been embracing the vocation of love to which God has been calling me.    

For were I left to my own devices, I would be hesitant to say both that I am an unprofitable servant, and that I have only done my duty.  If I had not been instructed otherwise, I would lament that I am an unprofitable servant, and that I am not even sure that I can say that I have even done my duty.  However, since Jesus directed us to say in the end, "We are unprofitable servants; we have only done what we were obliged to do,"******** then I do proclaim those words.  Knowing that I have done what God has called me to do, to declare the truth to my homeless brothers and sisters, that they deserve respect and are clothed in dignity, since they are loved by God and by me, I rest secure in the loving promise that God, in His great mercy, will forgive me to the extent I have failed in performing this duty.  

And so, whether it is today, tomorrow, or fifty or more years from now, secure in the knowledge that I am called to lovingly embrace my homeless brothers and sisters, and that God, in His immense mercy will forgive me insofar as I fail in my best efforts to overwhelmingly love them, I joyfully proclaim that I am going home to the Father.*********  When I finally get back home, my dear brothers and sisters, please do not grieve for me, for it will be the most glorious day I have ever seen.  For my tiny, paltry, measly efforts to love will be overwhelmed by the unbelievably warm tender glow of the infinite love of God.  And thanks to His magnificent mercy, I shall bask in the glory of His infinite love for all eternity.  Amen.  

* Romans 5:5 
** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
*** John 16:25 
**** John 16:29 
***** Matthew 26:26-29; Mark 14:22-25; Luke 22:14-20 
****** John 15:13 
******* John 14:30 
******** Luke 17:10 
********* John 16:16-17 

Reverence The Truth

Know thyself.  Assert who you are; declare the truth.  Proclaim your identity, no matter how much it costs, for the state of your soul depends on how you express yourself in this way.  Say and show who you really are, and you will feel a joy no one will be able to take from you, no matter what happens.  State the truth, and reverence the truth in how you act, and you respect the deepest recesses of your being.  

We hear the truth honored in these ways in the Gospel reading today, on Good Friday.  In today's Gospel reading, we hear that 

Judas got a band of soldiers and guards 
from the chief priests and the Pharisees 
and went there with lanterns, torches, and weapons.  
Jesus, knowing everything that was going to happen to him, 
went out and said to them, "Whom are you looking for?"  
They answered him, "Jesus the Nazorean."  
He said to them, "I AM."  
Judas his betrayer was also with them.  
When he said to them, "I AM, " 
they turned away and fell to the ground.    

So he again asked them,
"Whom are you looking for?"
They said, "Jesus the Nazorean."
Jesus answered,
"I told you that I AM.
So if you are looking for me, let these men go."
This was to fulfill what he had said, 
"I have not lost any of those you gave me."
Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it, 
struck the high priest's slave, and cut off his right ear.
The slave's name was Malchus.
Jesus said to Peter,
"Put your sword into its scabbard.
Shall I not drink the cup that the Father gave me?"  

So the band of soldiers, the tribune, 
and the Jewish guards seized Jesus,
bound him, and brought him to Annas first.  
He was the father-in-law of Caiaphas, 
who was high priest that year.
It was Caiaphas who had counseled the Jews 
that it was better that one man should die 
rather than the people.  

Simon Peter and another disciple followed Jesus.
Now the other disciple was known to the high priest, 
and he entered the courtyard of the high priest with Jesus.
But Peter stood at the gate outside.
So the other disciple, the acquaintance of the high priest, 
went out and spoke to the gatekeeper and brought Peter in.
Then the maid who was the gatekeeper said to Peter, 
"You are not one of this man's disciples, are you?"
He said, "I am not."
Now the slaves and the guards 
were standing around a charcoal fire
that they had made, because it was cold, 
and were warming themselves.  
Peter was also standing there keeping warm.  

And they said to him,
"You are not one of his disciples, are you?"
He denied it and said,
"I am not."
One of the slaves of the high priest, 
a relative of the one whose ear Peter had cut off, said, 
"Didn't I see you in the garden with him?"
Again Peter denied it.
And immediately the cock crowed.  

Then they brought Jesus from Caiaphas to the praetorium.
It was morning.
And they themselves did not enter the praetorium, 
in order not to be defiled so that they could eat the Passover.
So Pilate came out to them and said, 
"What charge do you bring against this man?"
They answered and said to him,
"If he were not a criminal, 
we would not have handed him over to you."
At this, Pilate said to them, 
"Take him yourselves, and judge him according to your law."
The Jews answered him, 
"We do not have the right to execute anyone, " 
in order that the word of Jesus might be fulfilled
that he said indicating the kind of death he would die.
So Pilate went back into the praetorium 
and summoned Jesus and said to him, 
"Are you the King of the Jews?"
Jesus answered,
"Do you say this on your own 
or have others told you about me?"
Pilate answered,
"I am not a Jew, am I?
Your own nation and the chief priests handed you over to me.
What have you done?"
Jesus answered,
"My kingdom does not belong to this world.
If my kingdom did belong to this world, 
my attendants would be fighting 
to keep me from being handed over to the Jews.  
But as it is, my kingdom is not here."  
So Pilate said to him, 
"Then you are a king?"  
Jesus answered, 
"You say I am a king.  
For this I was born and for this I came into the world, 
to testify to the truth.  
Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice."  
Pilate said to him, "What is truth?"  

When he had said this, 
he again went out to the Jews and said to them, 
"I find no guilt in him.  
But you have a custom 
that I release one prisoner to you at Passover.  
Do you want me to release to you the King of the Jews?"  
They cried out again, 
"Not this one but Barabbas!"  
Now Barabbas was a revolutionary.  

Then Pilate took Jesus and had him scourged.
And the soldiers wove a crown out of thorns 
and placed it on his head, 
and clothed him in a purple cloak, 
and they came to him and said,
"Hail, King of the Jews!"
And they struck him repeatedly.
Once more Pilate went out and said to them, 
"Look, I am bringing him out to you, 
so that you may know that I find no guilt in him."
So Jesus came out, 
wearing the crown of thorns and the purple cloak.  
And he said to them, "Behold, the man!"  
When the chief priests and the guards saw him they cried out, 
"Crucify him, crucify him!"  
Pilate said to them, 
"Take him yourselves and crucify him.  
I find no guilt in him."  
The Jews answered, 
"We have a law, and according to that law he ought to die, 
because he made himself the Son of God."
Now when Pilate heard this statement,
he became even more afraid, 
and went back into the praetorium and said to Jesus, 
"Where are you from?"  
Jesus did not answer him.  
So Pilate said to him, 
"Do you not speak to me?  
Do you not know that I have power to release you 
and I have power to crucify you?"  
Jesus answered him, 
"You would have no power over me 
if it had not been given to you from above.  
For this reason the one who handed me over to you
has the greater sin."
Consequently, Pilate tried to release him; 
but the Jews cried out, 
"If you release him, you are not a Friend of Caesar.  
Everyone who makes himself a king opposes Caesar."  

When Pilate heard these words he brought Jesus out 
and seated him on the judge's bench 
in the place called Stone Pavement, in Hebrew, Gabbatha.
It was preparation day for Passover, and it was about noon.
And he said to the Jews,
"Behold, your king!"
They cried out,
"Take him away, take him away! Crucify him!"
Pilate said to them,
"Shall I crucify your king?"
The chief priests answered,
"We have no king but Caesar."
Then he handed him over to them to be crucified.*  

Who are you?  When He was asked, Jesus said who He is.  He did not deny who He is, even with the great price associated with saying who He truly is.  He knew that the price, the sacrifice He was making of Himself through His death, is part of who He is.  Be ready to say who you are, no matter what the cost.  Do not forfeit your own happiness and joy, which comes from the fulfillment that arises from living out your true identity, the identity given to you by God.  

Others worry about the cost to us.  Saint Peter drew his sword to defend Jesus when soldiers came to arrest Him.  Our friends and our family want to save us from peril.  Yet when we embrace the duty of the present moment, as Jean-Pierre de Caussade notes, then we are at peace.  We abide in great calm regardless of what occurs, for then we live well aware of the truth that God ordains everything for the good of those who love Him.**  

Sometimes we might be so concerned with the cost to us and to others that we deny the truth.  When we deny the truth, we deny ourselves.  When we deny the truth, we condemn ourselves to death.  Saint Peter denied three times that he knew Jesus.  Don't deny who you are.  Don't deny who you follow.  Don't deny The Truth.  Yet if you do, God will forgive you if you wholeheartedly repent.  If you turn to God with all your heart, God will forgive you.  As Pope Francis has told us, the name of God is mercy, for God is love,*** and love shows mercy.  

We see love in how Jesus led His life.  In how He ministered to people, by teaching them and healing them, and from how He died for us, He showed that He loves us.  Jesus showed us that God is love.  How do we reply to the gift of love which Jesus has given to us?  Each and every one of us must choose how we respond to Jesus.  

Every human being must decide what they think of Jesus.  All people define themselves by how they relate to The Truth.  Pilate asked Jesus what truth is.  We can pretend that we don't know what the truth is.  Yet The Truth remains the truth.  We cannot escape the truth, nor can we escape the consequences of how we relate to The Truth.  

Pilate declared the truth.  He proclaimed that Jesus had done nothing wrong.  Yet we assert our relation to the truth not only in what we say, but also in what we do.  Although Pilate stated the truth, that Jesus had done nothing wrong, after so stating, then Pilate acted out of step with the truth.  Even though Pilate knew that Jesus had done nothing wrong, Pilate handed Jesus over to be crucified.  

Show who you are in what you say, and in what you do.  When we fully focus on the duty in the present moment to tell the truth, we are strengthened with serenity and peace.  When we reside utterly in the present duty to witness to the truth, we remain calm in the face of adversity, and courageously proclaim the truth.  When we firmly declare our loyalty to The Truth, we abide in deep peace, since we are embracing Jesus deep within us.  Then we speak from a place of safety and security deep within our being; then we state The Truth in accord with Jesus.  When we remain loyal to The Truth, we turn to God, and our souls are saved.  Amen.  

* John 18:3-18:18; John 18:25-19:16 
** Romans 8:28 
*** 1 John 4:8, 16