Hopefully Move Forward

The last year has been lovely.  God has shed His grace upon me.  Through His grace, He has empowered me to do His will.  I feel that I have done what He sent me here to do.  And so it seems that the time has come to move on from here.  

And so on January 1 I will move back to the hermitage.  I feel God is calling me back there. 

I imagine you are wondering how this conclusion intersects with my previous discernment to leave the hermitage.  

Although I did not explicitly say so, when I left the hermitage to serve poor persons, I was overwhelmingly focused on rejoining the Peace Corps.  I re-applied to the Peace Corps near the end of 2015, and in early 2016, Peace Corps informed me that they could not offer me a position.  

I applied or at least inquired with other organizations serving impoverished people abroad.  Either I didn't hear back at all, or at other times it didn't work out with those other organizations.  
Thus in time I came to realize that one reason I left the hermitage, to serve poor persons overseas, was not materializing.  I let it go, and so the path I thought I was following turned out to be taking me not as far away as I had envisioned.  

Since it started becoming clear I wouldn't be moving to another country again, I began to ponder serving poor folks here in the states.  Having been a Catholic Worker in San Jose before I moved into the hermitage,  I began to think about once again being a Catholic Worker.  

After a brief stint last summer filling in for my friends at Casa de Clara, the San Jose Catholic Worker House, I moved in here at the Redwood City Catholic Worker House.  After not too long, I began to get to know homeless folks here in Redwood City.  I came to witness the sense of community amongst those living on the streets here.  I became much closer with them than I had ever felt with homeless folks anywhere else.  And so I have felt much fulfillment as I have served people living on the streets here.  

And yet I have gradually, steadily, increasingly felt more and more spiritually malnourished despite how I have continued the spiritual practices I deepened at the hermitage.  I read Scripture.  I attend Mass.  Yet I have consistently felt that God has been calling me back into more solitude, more silence, more stillness, more contemplation.  I have felt that God has been calling me back into the deep prayer which monastic life fosters, and then will flow whatever service to poor folks naturally, organically arises out of monastic life.  

I feel too that God has given me the grace to make vows to Him.  I know that I can make vows of poverty, chastity and obedience to Him.  If I were not to do so, I would be wasting graces God has given to me.  If you know me well, you know well that I cannot stand wasting what God has given to us.  God has given us marvelous gifts: we should not only appreciate and use well His gifts, but thank and praise and adore and glorify God who gives us such magnificent gifts.  Out of gratitude to Him, I do not wish to be the servant who buries in the ground a coin or coins he has received from his Master.*  I do not wish to be the servant who wraps up in a cloth the coin He has received from His Master.**  

I used to think that God had not empowered me to make a vow of chastity.  Perhaps I was correct.  What I do know is that at times I have prayed to God for grace, and He has given it to me.  I have recalled how Our Blessed Mother Mary told Saint Catherine of Laboure that so many people do not receive certain graces because they do not ask for them.  I have seen for myself how it is true that you can receive a grace you have not had if you but ask for it.  

And so I will be moving on with a desire to use well what God has given to me.  I wish to invest well the talents God has given me, so that I may make more,*** just as Jesus teaches us to do.  

I look forward to trying to use well the gifts God has given to me.  I face forward into the future, though parting under these circumstances is bittersweet, and not just for me.  

I think of the homeless woman who once again I'll call "Kimberly."  She has shared her pain with me, and so she and I have come to appreciate each other.  Despite her sorrow, she has expressed to me that she wants to understand my reasons for leaving, and the goals I hope to reach, so that she can better support me in my decision to leave here.  

I think too of the homeless woman who again I'll call "Anna."  As she has been considering my moving away, in the context of how she has been well aware that she must repent and do her best to sin no more, she has confidently proclaimed that at the very least, she will see me again in eternity.  

I am greatly consoled by these mature words of faith, hope and love.  I am encouraged by the spiritual growth these words of sureness convey.  I am comforted as I adjust to leaving here, knowing that such faith resides amongst those who are homeless here.  

Thus I know that I am not deluding myself when I say that I have seen homeless persons rising up here.  I can move on since I have seen real growth and progress among them.  

I am reminded that recently a certain homeless woman who I'll once again call "Jane" showed up here at the Catholic Worker House.  She had rung the doorbell, and in speaking with a Catholic Worker here, she expressed gratitude, saying, "Thank you for helping me to rise up."  Jane too has been rising up from where she had been, to a better place, proven by the gratitude she has expressed.  

I have also seen with my own eyes how a certain woman, who I'll call "Helen," has also moved forward in her life.  Helen used to be homeless.  Now she lives in her own apartment, which I have seen.  I need not doubt her progress, which is evident.  

I hear and see all this proof of rising up with my own ears and with my own eyes.  As my time here draws to a close, I am encouraged by what I hear and see.  

And so, as night has fallen today, so too the twilight of my time here as a Catholic Worker is also upon me.  Yet as this night is upon us, I am not in despair, for a new dawn is rising up in homeless friends I have made here.  This dawn I have been seeing break open in them gives me hope, a hope which stretches beyond them, into the wide community of humanity.  This hope extends beyond this lifetime, into the limitless expanse of eternity.  The fruits of this faith, hope and love will be seen in eternity.  In eternity, we will see the consequences of our faith, hope and love.  

Let us move forward in faith, hope and love now, so that we may live in love for all eternity.  Amen.  

* Matthew 25:18,25 
** Luke 19:20 
*** Matthew 25:20,23 

Magnify Your Faith

An image suddenly appears.  Many years later, upon microscopic examination, much smaller images are discovered inside the originally visible large image.  All of this happens on a fabric which has not been decomposing even though many years have passed.    

The image is on the tilma, or the cloak, of an impoverished person named Saint Juan Diego, who lived in what is now known as Mexico.  In December 1531, the Blessed Virgin Mary appeared to Juan Diego.  He went to the archbishop to relate to him how Our Blessed Mother Mary had told him that a church should be built there in her honor.  The archbishop asked for a sign to prove who she was.  At her instruction, Juan Diego gathered roses up into his cloak.  When he opened his cloak before the archbishop and the roses fell onto the floor, there on his tilma was the image of Our Lady Of Guadalupe, whose feast day we celebrate today.  

In recent years scientists have closely examined the tilma.  Able to magnify portions of it, they have found fourteen persons depicted in the eyes of the image of Our Lady Of Guadalupe.  

Normally a tilma like this would have started coming apart once twenty years had passed.  However, after nearly 500 years, the tilma has stayed together.  

Here I have related only three miraculous properties of the tilma bearing the image of Our Lady Of Guadalupe.  I find these scientifically inexplicable phenomena encouraging my faith in God, in Jesus, born of Our Blessed Mother Mary.  

Recognize Afflicting Blessings

If we are wise, we can recognize the blessings in our afflictions.  If we truly are grateful to God, we thank Him for the adversity we face as well as the comfort we receive.  As we embrace those who are different from us, we are positioning ourselves to learn from them.  If we have faith in God, we welcome all God sends us.  If we have faith, we are saved.  

We are reminded of these truths in today's Gospel reading for Thanksgiving Day.  There we hear that 

As Jesus continued his journey to Jerusalem,
he traveled through Samaria and Galilee.
As he was entering a village, ten persons with leprosy met him.
They stood at a distance from him and raised their voices, saying,
"Jesus, Master! Have pity on us!"
And when he saw them, he said,
"Go show yourselves to the priests."
As they were going they were cleansed. 
And one of them, realizing he had been healed,
returned, glorifying God in a loud voice;
and he fell at the feet of Jesus and thanked him. 
He was a Samaritan.
Jesus said in reply,
"Ten were cleansed, were they not?
Where are the other nine? 
Has none but this foreigner returned to give thanks to God?" 
Then he said to him, "Stand up and go;
your faith has saved you."*  

These lepers may have anticipated that the apparent misfortune of their leprosy would provide the vehicle through which God would be glorified in them.  In their anguish, they cried out to Jesus to have pity on them.  Jesus, full of compassion and love for others, cured them.  The returning man recognized that God had had mercy on him, so he went back to Jesus, giving the glory and praise and honor due to God.  When we are suffering from what would usually be viewed as a malady, we can thank God for the apparently ill fortune which has befallen us, if we consider that our dilemma provides an avenue through which God can be glorified.  In our pain, we can capitalize on the excellent opportunity to earnestly call out to God to deliver us from what afflicts us.  God likes to hear us offer up ardent prayers to Him.  God hears and responds to fervent prayers.  Then when God saves us from what torments us, all the glory is due to God.  We can thank God not only for being delivered from agony, but also, realizing that trials supply opportunities for God to be glorified, we can also thank God for tribulations.  

At times we are well instructed in thanking and praising and glorifying God by those who are different from us.  The one leper who returned to thank God was a Samaritan.  Normally Jews did not associate with Samaritans.**  The foreigner demonstrated well the need to give thanks to God.  If we dismiss those who are unlike us, we run the risk of refusing to learn from them.  People dissimilar to us may have much important to teach us.  

The Samaritan, the excluded one, was saved by his faith.  Although he was a social outcast, he had the gift of faith from God.  Through that faith, he was saved.  

When we have faith, we welcome the apparent misfortune God sends us as well as the comfort He gives to us.  Having faith, and being cured, we thank God not only for the relief but also for the affliction.  With faith, we welcome into our hearts people who are not like us, aware that they can teach us since we are open to what they have to say.  Being so receptive through our faith, we are saved.  Amen.  

*  Luke 17:11-19
** John 4:9 

Have Some Faith

Do we wonder why God has not worked wonders in our lives?  When we question God so, do we consider how little we trust God?  

The more faith we have in God, the more God will amaze us.  Jesus explained to us that if we had faith merely the size of a mustard seed, that faith could move a mountain.*  

If we have just a little bit of faith, we will see God working wonders in our lives.  If we trust God, we will not be wondering how God is working in our lives, for we will see the truth of His glory being manifested right in front of us.  

* Matthew 17:20; Mark 11:23 

Imitating Loving Friends

Today I attended the funeral of a dear friend who I have called “Uncle.”  Uncle was a poetic and literate, religious, warm and hospitable, determined and committed, nurturing and loving soul.  I fondly remember him and treasure him in my heart for the admirable qualities he displayed.  

In what we value in our friends, we are presented with opportunities to become like them.  Our friends invite us to emulate them.  

I can honor Uncle not just by pondering what I appreciated about him.  Keeping in mind his faith, love of learning, welcoming nature, tenacity and compassion, I can strive to demonstrate these qualities as I try to love my neighbor as myself,* as Jesus instructed, and as Uncle aimed to do.  

In imitating our friends, including as we look back on our friends’ lives and recall what we appreciate about them, we can come to realize that death truly is a life-giving experience.  In feeling nourished by the consideration of the life of our dearly departed friend, we can feel joy in the midst of our sorrow.  

Uncle may have moved on to the next life, but he has left us with the gift of how he lived his life.  As I consider his death, I am moved to find new life in how he wholeheartedly embraced what God called him to do here on this earth.  

Of course we weep when our family members and friends pass on from this life to the next.  Yet in remembering how our deceased friends have lived, we can consider how we would like to live like them since they brought us joy.  In imitating our dearly departed friends, we can thus similarly bring others joy.  

Uncle was a great friend, and brought me much joy.  Realizing the joy he brought to me, I feel called to look at how he lived and how he loved.  

If we let the love of our departed friends live on in us, our friends can continue to live through us.  We can honor our deceased friends by helping them to live on through us.  

Friends live in our hearts.  They live in our hearts while they are still living in this life, and they still live in our hearts once they have passed on to the next life.  Our friends live in our hearts during our lives on this earth since we have welcomed them into our hearts.  If they remain in our hearts, they live on in our hearts once they have passed on to the next life.  

Let us consider how our friends have loved us.  Let us feel the joy our friends bring us.  A person is a friend if he helps you to love God, your neighbor and yourself.  

And so, looking back on the life of Uncle, I see a great friend.  He helped me to love God and my neighbor and myself.  And so I choose to imitate him.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Loving Is Becoming

I just got back from a memorial service for a dear friend.  I've told before about this friend I have cherished.  Years ago, after I had become friends with his daughters, he asked me to call him "Uncle."  

Uncle suffered a stroke nearly a year ago.  For almost a year, he was unable to speak, and could move much less than he used to be able.  He courageously endured these hardships while they were presented to him, and then a week ago, he passed from this life into the next.  

He lived his values, thus building a secure bridge from this life to the next.  In his tireless hope, in his tenacious faith, in his indefatigable love, he demonstrated to his youngest daughter the resilience she realized she wanted to study in her work as a psychologist.  In his eloquent musings he expressed in his poems, short stories and novel, he showed his eldest daughter the passion with which she realized she wanted to write.  In his silence, in his meditative pauses, in his carefully chosen words, speaking so mindfully that he seemed to be following a monastic practice, he implicitly and subtly encouraged me toward the monastic disciplines of silence and meditation which I have come to treasure.  

He showed us who we were to become.  He did not tell us who we were meant to be.  In being himself, he helped us to see who we were, and who we have been becoming.  

He loved himself, and so showed us how to love ourselves.  He loved himself, so he could love his neighbor as himself* as Jesus taught him to do.  

He could help others because he loved himself.  If we love ourselves, we can love our neighbor, and so we can become who God wants us to be.  Uncle loved himself, so he welcomed the invitation from God to become who God always meant him to be.  

In his life, he loved.  If we choose love, we welcome God into our hearts.  If we choose love, God welcomes us into Heaven.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Blessed With Faith

To have faith is to be blessed.  You are blessed when you have the gift of faith from God, for you are not relying on yourself.  With faith, you become more than yourself.  If you are moved by faith, you trust in God.  As faith lives in you, God breathes in you and speaks through you.  If you have faith, although God has already tremendously blessed you, God gives still more by using your faith to reshape the world.  

Today as we celebrate the Solemnity of the Assumption of The Blessed Virgin Mary into Heaven, we are reminded how God rewards those with faith.  In today's Gospel reading, we hear of such faith and how those with faith are so blessed.  There we hear that 

Mary set out
and traveled to the hill country in haste
to a town of Judah,
where she entered the house of Zechariah
and greeted Elizabeth.
When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting,
the infant leaped in her womb,
and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit,
cried out in a loud voice and said,
"Blessed are you among women,
and blessed is the fruit of your womb.
And how does this happen to me,
that the mother of my Lord should come to me?
For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears,
the infant in my womb leaped for joy.
Blessed are you who believed
that what was spoken to you by the Lord
would be fulfilled."

And Mary said:

"My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord;
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior
for he has looked with favor on his lowly servant.
From this day all generations will call me blessed:
the Almighty has done great things for me
and holy is his Name.
He has mercy on those who fear him
in every generation.
He has shown the strength of his arm,
and has scattered the proud in their conceit.
He has cast down the mighty from their thrones,
and has lifted up the lowly.
He has filled the hungry with good things,
and the rich he has sent away empty.
He has come to the help of his servant Israel
for he has remembered his promise of mercy,
the promise he made to our fathers,
to Abraham and his children forever."

Mary remained with her about three months
and then returned to her home.*  

Saint Elizabeth said to Our Blessed Mother Mary, "Blessed are you who believed that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled."  Our Blessed Mother Mary believed what the angel Gabriel had told her, that through the power of the Holy Spirit she would conceive and bear The Son who would save His people from their sins.**  She had faith that the promise made to her would be fulfilled.  Our Blessed Mother Mary is so blessed because God gave her a gift of great faith.  

And so Saint Elizabeth said to Our Blessed Mother Mary, "Blessed are you among women."  And so Catholics praying the rosary proclaim to Our Blessed Mother, "Blessed are you among women."  

Catholics pray the rosary because Our Blessed Mother is such an effective intercessor.  We have such an effective advocate in Our Blessed Mother because she prays for us with great faith.  Faith is power.  Through faith, we are empowered to do the will of God.  With faith, we can confidently pray, believing that our petitions according to the will of God will be granted.  Our Blessed Mother desired the will of God, so filled with faith she was.  Our Blessed Mother comes so efficiently to our aid, interceding with her Son Jesus because of her abounding faith.  

We can be considerably comforted to remember the power of faith.  When events in the world appear to go awry, and when circumstances in our personal lives seem amiss, through our faith we can call upon great power in our prayer when we might mistakenly believe we are lost.  When Our Blessed Mother Mary appeared to Saint Francisco, Saint Jacinta and Servant of God Lucia at Fatima in Portugal in 1917, she told them to pray the rosary for world peace.  We can achieve peace through prayer.  Faith brings peace in hearts by leading to dependence on God.  Through the power of faith, prayer can bring peace in the world.  

If we recognize that God has given us a gift by giving us faith, it follows that we are to accept this gift and use it well.  In gratitude to God, we can offer this faith to Him through our prayer.  In response to our prayer, God transforms the world.  When we accept the invitation from God to let Him transform the world through us, we are blessed that He uses us as vessels of change.  Like Our Blessed Mother Mary, if we welcome the gift of faith that God seeks to give us, we too can be instruments of the change God seeks to work in the world.  Let us welcome the gift of faith from God, and so allow the world to be transformed.  Amen.  

* Luke 1:39-56 
** Luke 1:31-35

Presently Prayerfully Loving

Today is the anniversary of the bombing of Nagasaki.  Today we also celebrate the feast day of Edith Stein, a nun martyred in Auschwitz.  One could think that these commemorations have nothing to do with how today I sat and talked with a recent college graduate.  Yet in all of these opportunities rests the duty of the present moment.  In every moment we are called by God.   
As we remember how a plutonium bomb was dropped on the Japanese city of Nagasaki exactly 72 years ago on August 9, 1945, killing tens of thousands of people, some of us might wonder what we can do to avert war.  I am convinced that in seeking world peace, the most effective step we can take is to pray.  I also strongly believe that we can take efficacious measures for world peace by praying the rosary.  One hundred years ago, at Fatima in Portugal, our Blessed Mother Mary instructed us to pray the rosary for world peace.  Had more people ardently implored our Blessed Mother Mary to intercede with her Son Jesus, the second world war would not have happened.  We fulfill the duty of the present moment when we pray.  

We also carry out the duty of the present moment, as was described in the eighteenth century by the Jesuit priest Jean-Pierre de Caussade, when we seek to do God's will.  Saint Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, previously known as Edith Stein, was raised Jewish.  However, after voraciously reading the autobiography of Saint Teresa of Avila late into the night, she not only became Catholic, but eventually also became a Carmelite nun.  Due to her Jewish heritage, the Nazis arrested her and sent her to Auschwitz, where she died in a gas chamber, probably exactly 75 years ago, on August 9, 1942.  She said that we surely may pray to be spared, but that certainly we should add the additional prayer to God, "Not my will be done, but Thy will be done."*  We find God's will in the present moment, so when we submit to the present moment and what it demands of us, we obey God's will.  Wherever we are in the present, there may God's will be done.  Where we find ourselves, there we pray.  

Today I found myself sitting at the kitchen table here in the Catholic Worker House with a young woman who I heard speak at Mass this past weekend.  At the end of Mass she got up and spoke briefly about how she is devoting her efforts to helping other young people who have fallen away from their faith.  She indicated she would be happy to speak with anyone who would like to hear more about her work.  After Mass, I asked her to contact me.  We arranged for her to come here to the Catholic Worker House.  

In relating to me how she aims to get to know the persons she seeks to help, I felt indirectly guided in what she said.  It seemed to me that the Holy Spirit was speaking through her.  It occurred to me that perhaps Jesus was telling me that I must get to know the homeless people and other impoverished persons I aspire to serve as a Catholic Worker.  I believe that in hearing her story, I was being told how I am to live my life, how I am to love my neighbor as myself.**  I would want someone to care enough about me to get to know me, so as to understand me; thus I should get to know others so I can better understand them.  In better understanding others, I can more easily be compassionate towards them, and thus love them as I love myself.  When I find myself in the present moment, I am to listen as best I can to my neighbor.  In giving my neighbor my full attention, and learning about her, I love my neighbor, and thus I fulfill my duty to the present moment.  

We embrace the present moment when we love our neighbor.  We carry out the duty of the present when we pray.  We open our hearts to the present when we do the will of God.  No matter how disparate the circumstances, no matter what is happening, we are called to pray and to love our neighbor, and thus do our duty right now, and thus do the will of God.  Let us open our hearts, and love God with all our heart, mind, soul and strength,*** and our neighbor as ourselves, and thus do God's will.  Amen.  

* Matthew 26:39,42
** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
*** Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27 

Trust Yields Grace

When we fear, we are not trusting in God.  When we arrogantly assume we can get along without God, we are deciding that we will not trust in God.  

When we have faith in God, we are trusting in God.  When we admit we need God's help, then we can start to trust in God.  

When we truly, fully trust in God, we find our faith is well-placed.  God will not scorn a humble, contrite heart.*  God gives grace to the humble.**  

* Psalm 51:17  

** 1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6 

Love Extinguishes Fear

A few days ago at our weekly house Mass here at the Catholic Worker House, we heard about knowing Jesus, who He is, how much He loves us, and the importance of faith.  When we know Jesus and who He is, we have faith in Him, and we have no fear, for we know that Jesus loves us, for God is love,* and in love there is no room for fear.**  In the Gospel reading we heard at that house Mass, we heard that 

It happened that one day Jesus got into a boat with His disciples and said to them, "Let us cross over to the other side of the lake."  So they set out, and as they sailed He fell asleep.  When a squall of wind came down on the lake, the boat started taking in water and they found themselves in danger.  So they went to rouse Him, saying, "Master!  Master!  We are lost!"  Then He woke up and rebuked the wind and the rough water; and they subsided and it was calm again.  He said to them, "Where is your faith?"  They were awestruck and astounded and said to one another, "Who can this be, that gives orders even to winds and waves and they obey Him?"***  

At the house Mass, someone explained that the Apostles had been afraid because they were still asking who Jesus is.  When we know who Jesus is, we are not afraid, for when we know who Jesus is, we know love, for God is love, and in love there is no room for fear.  

Let us know Jesus, and know love.  In coming to know Jesus, let us come to know perfect love, and thus come to have all fear cast out of us.****  Amen.  

* 1 John 4:8,16 
** 1 John 4:18 
*** Luke 8:22-25 
**** 1 John 4:18 

Waste Not Tears

We are all faced over and over with the decision of whether or not we will love.  We all choose our relationship with pain.  We all decide whether we embrace suffering or reject it.  In what we accept or deny, we determine whether or not we love.  

We can cry out of hopeless desperation, feeling frantic, and convinced that all is lost.  Or we can profoundly weep out of great love for others.  

We can let tears fall from our eyes without realizing their value.  Or we can weep offering our tears as prayers to God.  

All we send out from our being echoes out into the universe.  As a tear falls from your eye, if you offer it as a humble prayer to God, when it drops into the liquid lake of spiritual solidarity we share, you can implicitly offer that tear to help others.  Your tearful prayers are effective when they are offered as the basis of humble and earnest prayer.  When such humble, ardent tears of yours hit the liquid lake of spiritual community we share, these tears send out ripples of love across that surface.  Thus through such tears you can seek to strengthen your spiritual brothers and sisters.  

I am not merely speaking in theoretical terms here.  Ever since earlier this week, when a dear homeless friend who I'll once again here call "Sally" shared with me how she views tears as liquid prayers, her statement of spiritual insight has been echoing in my soul.  Like a drop of water that falls into a pond and causes ripples outward, so her tender spiritual musing, coming into contact with my ears, has been echoing in my soul.  
Despite the struggle, Sally has chosen not to let her agonizing experiences dominate how she responds to life.  As I have mentioned in prior blog posts, Sally has endured domestic violence.  Despite having been hit hard many times by multiple men, Sally refuses to be enslaved by the pain she has felt.  Instead she offers up her tears to God.  Interwoven with her sensitivity and fragility, she also displays a courageous and admirable tenacity, and so she sends out a strong message of faith, hope and love, that pain can be the basis of a beautiful transformation of one's spirit.   

Knowing, then, that we can consent to our suffering being transformed into the joy that emerges out of service of others, we can come to experience a radical alteration of how we feel pain, see pain, and respond to pain.  Aware that God works all for the good of those who love Him,* we come to realize that even anguish can lead to joy, if we seize upon such opportunities to petition God.  Thus in all we experience we can be joyous,** if all we do is for the praise, glory and honor of God.  

Conscious that all we experience presents us chances to glorify God by assenting to call upon Him so He may show us His great love always, we come to give thanks always for all things.***  As we come to express such gratitude at all times, God comes to give us a deep, abiding and enduring peace, as, feeling His love, Jesus comes to abide in us, and we in Him.****  

Let us embrace every opportunity we have, then, including in the midst of our tears, to pray constantly,***** give thanks for all things always, and thus love God and love our neighbor.  Thus we come to live a life of love.  Amen.  

* Romans 8:28 
** 1 Thessalonians 5:16 
*** 1 Thessalonians 5:18 
**** John 15:4-7,9-10
***** 1 Thessalonians 5:17 

Fruits Of Love

If we have faith in God, we will see the goodness of God.  As we trust in God, we come to see that God works wonders, sometimes in others, and at times in us.  

God seeks to change the world by inviting us to trust in Him.  Through the trust we have in God, we can become the change we want to see in the world.  If we are confidently sure that God will transform us and our neighbor, we have already changed the world by allowing ourselves to be altered by welcoming the gift of faith that God has given us.  

If we have faith and if we love our neighbor, we can come to see that God works wonders in such situations.  If we love our neighbor as ourselves,* as Jesus taught us to do, we will be patient with our neighbor.**  Feeling loved, our neighbor will come to love herself.  Our neighbor will then come to make good decisions which affirm his own worth.  

This week I have seen the fruits of such love.  Here at the Catholic Worker House we heard about a particular man who had recently been homeless and then left town.  We heard from his friends who have loved him, about how, since he left town, he has taken steps which show he loves himself.  

Here once again I'll call this recently homeless man "Davey."  While he lived here in Redwood City, Davey was homeless, sleeping in the bushes and in tents and wherever he could find a place to sleep.  Since he left town, he has gotten a job.  We also heard that he has been clean since he left town.  He has stopped using the substances which had been troubling for him.  

Davey's friends have kept showing him love.  In time he has come to love himself, which shows in how he has been making choices reflecting how he loves and respects himself.  

I heard that Davey will be back in town in about a week.  I am looking forward to seeing him and the fruits of the love which his friends have shown to him.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
** 1 Corinthians 13:4 

Returning Transformed Neighbor

If we keep on loving our neighbor, the little seed of love in the heart of our neighbor can bear much fruit.  With patience, kindness and understanding, we can come to witness the transformative power of the love of God.  As Jesus comes to us and abides in us,* the love of God can come to transform our neighbor before our very eyes.  Thus in time, our faith can be strengthened, and we can come to trust in God ever more deeply.  As we trust in God and open our hearts to Him, we consent to Him loving our neighbor through us.  

I have been reminded today of these truths.  Today a particular young man who has been homeless showed up here at the Catholic Worker House.  He asked me to tell my fellow Catholic Worker Susan that he is grateful for all of the help she has given to him over the last several months.  

I've previously mentioned this particular fellow.  Once again I'll call him "Brendon."  

In a prior post I'd written of how Brendon admitted that he needed to stop taking drugs.  In another blog entry, I'd related how Brendon had been trying to enter a drug treatment program.  Today he told me that he has been in a drug rehab program.  I saw the obvious results of how he has been taking care of himself and loving himself: he seemed full of life, vibrant, eager, attentive, considerate, respectful and grateful.  He seemed focused on those around him who were listening to him and offering to help him.  

Brendon explained that in about a week, he will be moving back east.  He quickly added that to reach his destination, he needed a bus ticket which would cost between one hundred and two hundred dollars.  As he was talking about the cost of the bus ticket, someone on the front porch of the Catholic Worker House heard him and offered to help to defray the cost of his trip.  The impoverished young man had appealed for help, and he got it.  

Jesus tells us that whatever we do to the least of those among us, we do to Him.**  Jesus is in the homeless people and the other poor men and women who plead with us for help.  Who am I, that my Lord and my God comes to my doorstep?***  Jesus comes to us in those who are impoverished, who come to our door, then go away, not to be seen for weeks, and then come back.  Jesus goes away, and a short while later, He returns to us.****  Jesus shows me that He is with us always.*****  Jesus shows me that He calls us to take care of each other, especially the poor, for Jesus is in our neighbor, and especially in the impoverished.  

In coming to me in the poor young man who knocks at my door, Jesus nurtures my faith, for He keeps His promise and He comes to me.  Jesus comes to make sure I am practicing the law of love.  Jesus comes up to me to make sure I am loving Him in my neighbor.  

Seeing Jesus come to us, then we can pray confidently to Him.  We can be sure of the hope we have in His promise, for we have seen that He has not left us alone; He has come to us.******  Knowing that we have not been abandoned, seeing the proof of His transformative power that has been demonstrated in our neighbor being healed, we come to trust in God.   

When we truly have faith in God, then we come to see that God is always calling us back home to Him.  If we utterly trust in God, we realize that God is always welcoming us back home to Him with open arms.  Grasping that God is always offering us His warm loving embrace in all that happens to us, we welcome Him into our hearts.  Empowered with the love of God, God transforms us, and we are healed, and we become who God has always intended us to be.  Loving ourselves, loving our neighbor, and loving God, we become the love of God in the world.  Amen.  

* John 15:7, 9 
** Matthew 25:40 
*** Luke 1:43 
**** John 16:16-17, 19 
***** Matthew 28:20 
****** John 14:18 

Always Welcoming God

God is constantly inviting us to welcome Him into our hearts.  At times God gives us pleasure: at these moments, we are to thank God for how He nourishes us.  At other times God tries us, and tests us through difficulties: at such junctures, we are to thank God that He is strengthening us.  At such times, we are to petition God that He help us to weather what we are enduring.  In any event, no matter what our circumstances, we are to thank God, aware that God loves us immeasurably.  As we welcome the love of God into our hearts,* we see the love we want there to be in the world.  Thus conscious that all we receive provides occasions to be grateful to God, we come to appreciate the value of both delights as well as pains.  

Here in this country so often we are given numerous material blessings.  In this way we have constant opportunities to thank God.  Through so many avenues I have witnessed the generous loving care of God, including through substantial amounts of food which caring people donate.  

Occasionally I've gotten calls from a certain supermarket, telling us that they had a lot of food to donate to us.  Amongst the food they gave to us, we received some particularly delectable desserts.  

Both a certain homeless friend of mine and I are fond of sweets in general, and also this one particular dessert.  So both she and I enjoyed this one certain dessert.  

Weeks after I'd picked up one of those large donations of food and we'd enjoyed some of those especially delicious desserts, my friend asked me, "Hey, you haven't gotten any more of that kind of dessert, have you?"  

I replied, "No, we haven't gotten any more of those.  We don't usually come across those."  

Ever since she asked for more of those particular desserts, from time to time I think of how her request reflects how we live in such a state of abundance in this country.  I've thought that if, as a homeless woman, and as a man who survives mostly on food donations, we can not only get all the sweets we want, but can express our preferences for types of desserts, it's a good reflection of how incredibly God blesses us with material benefits here in this country.  

Being incredibly blessed, we are called to give thanks to God always** for these material blessings.  God can draw us closer to Him by doting upon us.  We can be sanctified through comforts, we can be purified in our relationship with God due to luxuries, if such blessings lead us to thank God more fervently and more often than we have been thanking Him.  

Some people complain that there are many poor people who greatly suffer.  They demand how God can exist when such suffering is felt.  As we become increasingly desperate, we are presented with ever more precious opportunities to grow closer to God by depending ever more upon Him.  When we are faced with hardship, we are presented with a chance to call upon God to help us.  If we respond to adversity by praying to God to give us grace and strength, through an ordeal we can be sanctified, and our relationship with God can be deepened.  

Here in this country so often we are bountifully blessed by God with numerous material benefits.  We can become complacent in our acceptance of such blessings from God.  We can get used to not expressing our gratitude to God for how generously He blesses us.  If we start to take for granted copious blessings from God, and thus show a lack of gratitude to God, we come to resent trials and tribulations when they befall us, instead of recognizing them as the loving invitations from God that they are.  

When we come to realize that God is love,*** we come to see that God is always inviting us to welcome Him into our hearts.  Once we recognize that since God is infinite, and thus that God loves infinitely, we come to see that God works all for the good of those who love Him.****  As we open our hearts to all that God presents to us, we realize that God intends everything in our lives for our benefit.  

By thus coming to trust in God and have faith in Him, we open our hearts to His love.  In welcoming God's love, we come to be channels of His love.  In time we can bring peace to our neighbor, by helping to show to our neighbor through our loving actions that God is loving us in every moment, in all that happens.  As we welcome the will of God in our lives, and the love of God into our hearts, we become empowered to love our neighbor.  With God in our hearts, we love our neighbor as ourselves, just as Jesus taught us to do.*****  With God abiding in us,****** and loving through us, God gives us peace, and the world comes to be as we wish it to be.  

Opening our hearts to God, we welcome God into our lives, no matter what happens.  Opening our hearts to love, we love regardless of what occurs.  Fully open to God, and thus completely open to love, we become love.  Let us open our hearts to God, and thus to love, so that He may love our neighbor through us, and so we may become the love we wish to see in the world.  Amen.  

* Romans 5:5 
** 1 Thessalonians 5:18 
*** 1 John 4:8,16 
**** Romans 8:28 
***** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
****** John 15:7 

Littleness Bears Fruit

This morning I looked out my window here at the Catholic Worker House and saw Jacqueline walking down the sidewalk.  She's a homeless woman who came here to the Catholic Worker House a few weeks ago.  

That night nearly a month ago, the doorbell rang.  When a Catholic Worker opened the door, there stood Jacqueline.  She explained that she was by herself.  And then, she added, as she burst into tears and started sobbing, that she didn't know where she was going to stay for the night.  

Although the Catholic Worker answering the door felt like she couldn't do anything to help, she figured she could at least try to calm Jacqueline.  She suggested to Jacqueline that she sit down on our front porch and take some time to rest.  She told Jacqueline that when another Catholic Worker got home in a little while, we could put our heads together to figure out how we could help her.  

Jacqueline sat down on the porch and began to eat something someone had given to her.  Later that evening, I went out to the porch to check on Jacqueline, but she was gone.  

A couple of days ago, when I was out and about here in Redwood City, I saw a woman walking through a parking lot.  Wanting to be friendly, I greeted her.  

She came over to me and her face lit up.  She revealed to me that she was the one who had been so distraught that night on the porch.  Somehow I hadn't recognized her.  Jacqueline expressed much appreciation and gratitude, saying that she had felt supported during her time in need by that Catholic Worker who had answered the door that night.  She updated me on her life, relating that since then, she has started living in a homeless shelter here in Redwood City.  She was beaming as she happily told me about how she is doing.  

Now Jacqueline is finding shelter and security.  That night a few weeks ago, it seemed she was inconsolable, yet in the midst of her trial, she was finding comfort and care: it had seemed that there was little or nothing that could be done to help, yet that Catholic Worker had been soothing her more than initially was apparent.  

There in the little scraps of time which that Catholic Worker had had with her, in the present moment with her, were tiny chances to perform little actions of love for her.  We can brush off opportunities to give little gifts of love to others, since in the duty of the present moment God might be calling us to such minuscule acts of love that we conclude such opportunities are too insignificant to bear substantial fruit.  

Yet in every little chance we get to love our neighbor as ourselves* as Jesus taught us, we are given a chance to plant a little mustard seed for the sake of the Kingdom of God.  If we seize every small chance we have to love our neighbor, if we plant every such tiny little seed of love, much fruit can result for the Kingdom of God.  

Jesus told us if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we could move mountains.**  If we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we will have confidence in God's ability to bear much fruit through our little actions of love in each moment, in every tiny scrap of time.  If we have faith, we can value little fragments of time which "The Cloud of Unknowing" describes, and we can be more attentive to "The Sacrament of the Present Moment" as Jean-Pierre de Caussade urges, and can be well-positioned to perform little acts of love, as Saint Therese of Lisieux related.  

Little acts of love are like little grains of wheat: as long as they remain unused and unplanted, they have little value.  Just as little grains of wheat yield a harvest once they are planted, so it is that little loving actions only yield much spiritual fruit once they are actually carried out.  

Jesus told us that unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains a single grain; yet if it dies, it yields a rich harvest.***  If we but die to the inaccurate assumptions we have about what God calls us to do in the present moment, and instead embrace the person standing in front of us, the microscopic seeds of our miniature acts can bear much fruit in the heart of our neighbor.  Having faith in this approach to life, we can let God move mountains through us, when it seems we are only picking up a grain of sand.  With faith, we become more comfortable with dying to our own ideas about what we are to do, and are freed up to love our neighbor in his time of need.  

When we love our neighbor in his time of need, his fear about surviving dies.  When we love our neighbor, we let God love our neighbor through us, and our neighbor is reassured that he is loved by God and by us, and is given the strength from God to carry onward.  When our neighbor lets the fear in her die, she can live to grow into the person God has always intended her to be; she can see who she is and what she is to do.  

Dying to his fear, our neighbor rises from the death that fear had caused.  Then when we see our neighbor risen from the dead, we do not recognize our neighbor.****  He has grown into the new person God has always intended him to be.  He is living out the new life God has meant for him to live.  We foster and nourish this new life when we die to our misconceptions of what we believe we are being called to do in the current moment.  

By embracing the duty of the present moment, to love our neighbor in every little instant of time, we realize that every small act of love for another can bear much fruit in the heart of that person.  By letting God love others through us, others have the love they need to become who God has always intended them to be.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
** Matthew 17:20; Matthew 21:21; Mark 11:23 
*** John 12:24 
**** Luke 24:16; John 21:4 

Wonders From Humility

God is always extending His hand to us.  God will not force us to come to Him.  God loves us so much that He gave us our free will to use as we choose.  

And so God invites us to become more than we have been.  God asks us to assent to His plan, to let ourselves be humbled so that great things may be done through us.  

We are reminded that God works in this way as we celebrate today the Feast of the Visitation of the Blessed Virgin Mary.  Today as we remember how our Blessed Mother Mary visited her cousin Elizabeth, we recall that God lifts up the lowly and exalts them.  We hear of these wonders in today's Gospel, where we are told that 

Mary set out 
and traveled to the hill country in haste 
to a town of Judah, 
where she entered the house of Zechariah 
and greeted Elizabeth.  
When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, 
the infant leaped in her womb, 
and Elizabeth, filled with the Holy Spirit, 
cried out in a loud voice and said, 
"Most blessed are you among women, 
and blessed is the fruit of your womb.  
And how does this happen to me, 
that the mother of my Lord should come to me?  
For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears, 
the infant in my womb leaped for joy.  
Blessed are you who believed 
that what was spoken to you by the Lord 
would be fulfilled."  

And Mary said: 
"My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord; 
my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, 
for he has looked with favor on his lowly servant.  
From this day all generations will call me blessed: 
the Almighty has done great things for me, 
and holy is his Name.  

He has mercy on those who fear him 
in every generation.  
He has shown the strength of his arm, 
he has scattered the proud in their conceit.  
He has cast down the mighty from their thrones, 
and has lifted up the lowly.  
He has filled the hungry with good things, 
and the rich he has sent away empty.  
He has come to the help of his servant Israel 
for he has remembered his promise of mercy, 
the promise he made to our fathers, 
to Abraham and his children for ever."  

Mary remained with her about three months
and then returned to her home.*  

When her cousin Elizabeth was pregnant, our Blessed Mother Mary set out to the home of Elizabeth.  She went to share with Elizabeth the Good News that Jesus was to be born.  She went to minister to Elizabeth in her pregnancy.  Our Blessed Mother Mary went to serve Elizabeth.  We can emulate our Blessed Mother Mary by serving others.  

When our Blessed Mother Mary entered the home of her cousin Elizabeth, Elizabeth exclaimed, "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb."  We find this declaration of the blessedness of our Blessed Mother Mary and her Son Jesus not only in the Gospel according to Saint Luke.  Also while reciting the rosary, Christians proclaim the blessedness of our Lord Jesus and His Mother Mary.  We too can join Saint Elizabeth and feel the joy of The Visitation by praying the rosary.  

Elizabeth wondered, "How does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?"  Elizabeth was honored to be visited by our Blessed Mother Mary, yet she could not fathom how she could be accorded the great privilege of being visited by the mother of the Messiah.  We too can wonder how we can be so blessed that our Blessed Mother Mary dotes such great kindness upon us, given our abhorrent sinfulness.  We receive such marvelous and magnanimous assistance from our Blessed Mother since she is humble, loving and sweet.  She answers our cries because she loves us so very much.  Thus we are to cry out to her now, as we are mourning and weeping in this valley of tears.  She very much wants us to call out to her, to ask her to intercede with her Son on our behalf.  

It truly only begins to describe the tremendous effectiveness of our Blessed Mother's intercession to say that she is a formidable intercessor for us.  If people only realized how much sway her prayers have in Heaven, far more people would be seeking her intercession.  Full of the knowledge of how our Blessed Mother Mary protects us if we but call out to her, we are full of joy.  Similarly, right after our Blessed Mother Mary entered the home of Elizabeth, Elizabeth cried out, "The infant in my womb leapt for joy."  In the womb of Elizabeth, Saint John the Baptist was rejoicing at the arrival of our Blessed Mother Mary.  In the loving care of our Blessed Mother Mary, we have nothing to fear, so we rejoice.  

Elizabeth said to our Blessed Mother Mary, "Blessed are you who believed that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled."  Our Blessed Mother Mary has been so blessed because, during her life here on earth, she was filled with faith.  If we too wish to be blessed, we do will well to embrace the gift of faith from God.  

Our Blessed Mother Mary then replied, "My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord."  Our Blessed Mother Mary strove to live out the greatest commandment, "to love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind."**  First and foremost in the heart of our Blessed Mother Mary was the desire to open her heart to the will of God.  God calls us too to open our hearts to His will for us.  

Our Blessed Mother Mary told Elizabeth that her spirit rejoiced in God Her Savior.  When we know God saves us, we rejoice.  When we realize we have nothing to fear, we rejoice.  

She knew that God had looked with favor on His lowly servant.  Our Blessed Mother Mary was a poor peasant, yet God bestowed immense grace upon her.  God gives grace to the humble.***  

Well aware of how abundantly God had blessed her, our Blessed Mother Mary confidently announced that all generations would call her blessed.  She knew that she would be remembered as a shining, luminous reflection of God's great glory.  

All generations call Mary blessed because the Almighty has done great things for her.  God has shown His mighty glory through our Blessed Mother Mary.  

Having been reminded of what God had done for her, our Blessed Mother Mary proclaimed that Holy is the name of God.  She knew that all glory belongs to God, so she proclaimed that His name is holy.  We too must keep in mind that all glory is to go to God.  

Since she had experienced His great mercy, she explained that He has mercy on those who fear Him in every generation.  When we realize who we are, namely that we are nothing without God, we fear Him, and we beg Him for mercy.  

Our Blessed Mother Mary described how God has scattered the proud.  She noted that He has cast down the mighty.  God opposes the proud.****  To be like our Blessed Mother Mary, we must turn away from the temptation to pride; we must be humble like our Blessed Mother Mary.  

Everyone who raises himself up will be humbled.  The one who humbles himself will be raised up.*****  

Our Blessed Mother Mary experienced Herself how God lifted up the lowly.  God exalted her, an impoverished little girl.  God gives grace to the humble.  

And so our Blessed Mother Mary declared that God had filled the hungry with good things.  Some people question why there are poor people in the world.  Some ask why there is suffering.  The poor are blessed insofar as they are close to God.  The more desperate we are, the more we cry out to God with earnest prayer, and thus the more likely God is to grant our prayers.  God fills those who are hungry with good things, which provide them the spiritual nourishment they need to survive into true life together with Him.  

Often we think that those who are materially rich are blessed.  So often those who are materially rich are spiritually impoverished.  If we are too comfortable, we do not pray as we should. And thus often the rich are sent away empty, as our Blessed Mother Mary noted.  If we are not humble, we are not accorded grace.  

And yet if we have humility, if we submit ourselves to the will of God, then God comes to our help.  And so our Blessed Mother Mary rejoiced that God had come to the help of His servant Israel.  She was grateful that God had remained faithful to His promise of mercy.  God is merciful, since He is faithful to His promise.  God is faithful, even if we are unfaithful.  He cannot be unfaithful, for His Word is truth.******  

And so if we but give our consent to be humbled like our Blessed Mother Mary was, God will give us the grace we need to do His will.  Opening our hearts to God, God will work wonders through us, just as He worked wonders through our Blessed Mother Mary.  

* Luke 1:39-56 
** Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27; Deuteronomy 6:5 
*** 1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6 
**** 1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6 
***** Matthew 23:12; Luke 14:11; Luke 18:14 
****** John 14:6