Ask And Receive

Just yesterday I read for the first time about how Our Blessed Mother Mary appeared to Saint Catherine Laboure.  Our Blessed Mother Mary told Saint Catherine Laboure that there are graces that are available but people don't receive them because they don't ask for them.  

It makes me think that people could mistakenly conclude that God has not called them to a particular vocation, because they do not have a specific grace they need to live out that vocation.  Yet perhaps God is calling them to that certain vocation, but they feel unable to embrace that vocation only because they have not asked for what they need to follow that vocation.  

God gives us what we ask for,* when we ask for what we need to do His will.  God waits for us to ask for the right thing.  God wants us to exercise our free will.  God loves us so much that he respects our freedom of choice.  Truly loving us, God will not force us.  We see evidence of how God does not coerce us in the gentleness and the tenderness and the humility of the heart of Jesus.**    

God is love.***  Love is patient.****  God patiently waits for us to decide whether we will choose to be who He made us to be.  If we embrace who God has always intended us to be, we become our true selves.  If we accept who God created us to be, we welcome the truth of who we are.  Let us ask God for what we need to do His will, and become who God has always meant us to be.  Amen.  

* Matthew 7:7 
** Matthew 11:29 
*** 1 John 4:8,16 
**** 1 Corinthians 13:4 

Learning From Others

When we become who God has always meant us to be, we help others to realize who God has always intended them to be.  When we love, we help others to love.  

In my quest to discover my true identity, I have been assisted by numerous friends.  This week and last week, I have been thinking especially of a dear friend of mine who passed away at the end of last month.  I've written before of this cherished friend, who I have called "Uncle."  In his reflective, meditative way, Uncle supplied helpful insight to me as I have struggled to find my real identity.  For years he served me as a valuable friend, accompanying me as I did work which I knew was not the best fit for me.  

For ten years I worked as an attorney, even though I really didn't want to be doing such work; I was forcing myself to work as an attorney so I could pay off my large debts.  I didn't have an idea of what I would do next until I had been a lawyer for more than a few years.  Even though I didn't know what I would do after I stopped being a lawyer, I was impatient to move on and stop lawyering.  

Usually I remained silent about wanting to switch to some other type of work.  However, looking back at those days as an attorney, it seems that even though so often I kept quiet about wanting to cease lawyering, now I feel I was receiving direction about where I was headed.  Now it seems as if Uncle and the rest of the family were implicitly preparing me and teaching me simply by welcoming me into their homes.  

At this point it seems as if, embedded in their actions of welcoming me into their homes, they were showing me that I was taking steps to get ready for what I would do next.  Yet if Uncle had explained their assistance through words, I envision that he would have taken one of his characteristic pauses in which he carefully pondered what he was about to say.  Then I can imagine him gently and wisely advising me, "In what you are doing right now, you are preparing for what you want to do later."  

Often we don't see right away how we are preparing for what will come later.  Friends help us see what we can't see.  

I visualize him having given me this insight while sitting with him at one of the many family celebrations with him and the rest of his family.  At Thanksgiving dinners and birthday celebrations, I was welcomed into their family.  Insofar as they're Filipino, I was repeatedly experiencing the context of a different cultural background when we celebrated together on these occasions.  

As I was welcomed time and again into their homes, they didn't realize that they were preparing me to go into the Peace Corps.  Just as Uncle and the rest of their family welcomed me into their homes and another cultural background, similarly once I arrived with the Peace Corps in Morocco, I was being welcomed into host families in another culture.  

Long after I left Morocco, I realized that Uncle's warmth and generosity and welcoming nature had been echoed in the hospitality I received in Morocco.  Yet before I had even left Morocco, I had resolved to extend hospitality to others once I left Morocco.  And so I was influenced in my decision to enter a reformed Benedictine monastery, since Benedictine monks offer hospitality to visitors.  I lived and worked at the Camaldolese hermitage on the Big Sur coast of California partly since I strove to be hospitable just as Uncle and the rest of his family, as well as Moroccans, were hospitable to me.  

Similarly, I have felt drawn to live and work at Catholic Worker Houses partly since I have wanted to offer hospitality to those in need of it.  Thus I find myself here at this Catholic Worker House in part due to Uncle's warm and giving and hospitable nature.  

Thus I return to what I wrote in a recent blog post: in being ourselves, we help others to find themselves.  As we give, we help others to give.  

Uncle and his daughters and the rest of their family, in extending hospitality to me, led me to realize I wanted to extend hospitality to others.  In being themselves, they helped me to be me.   When we embrace who God calls us to be, we help others realize who God calls them to be.  

When we love, we help others to love.  When we love others, we show who we are. 

When we love others, we welcome others into our hearts.  When we love others, we welcome God into our hearts.  

When we extend hospitality to our neighbor, we love our neighbor as ourselves,* as Jesus taught us to do.  We would like to receive hospitality from others, so when we offer hospitality to others, we treat others as we would like to be treated.  

We become what we do.  When we love, we become love.  Let us love, help others to love, and become love.  Amen.  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Love Gently Waits

If you love someone, you wait for them.  Feeling love, you do not try to force or coerce another person.  

If your friend does not wish to go with you, with love you do not insist on your friend going with you.  Love does not demand; love does not intimidate; love is not overbearing.  

Love gently waits.  Love generously gives room to another person to come when he or she is ready, or even never at all, if that is what the other person chooses.  Love lets someone else choose for herself.  

Love respects another person's free will.  Love gives someone else comfort and peace from the dignity of being allowed the latitude to make his own choices.  

Love softly submits to the law of freedom.  Love obeys the necessity that people must have the dignity of making their own choices.  Love tenderly tells that others must be free to realize in their own time who they are.  

Since we desire our own freedom, we must let others be free, and not enslave them in our ideas of who we want them to be.  If we wish to be respected, we must respect others.  Knowing that we wish to be loved, we can come to love our neighbor as ourselves, as Jesus taught us to do.*  

* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 

Loving Poor Treasures

When we love, we choose to be humbled.  As we give of ourselves, we let ourselves be humbled, since we are choosing someone else over ourselves.  When we allow ourselves to be humbled, God gives us the grace to love our neighbor, including those among us who are marginalized.  By the grace of God, we can come to see how persons living on the fringes of society are more like us than we had thought, and thus come to love and cherish them.  Thus, since we come to see we are more like others than we had thought, we necessarily give up our conceptions of ourselves so that we can become who God has always intended us to be.  We let go of our images of ourselves so we can see God made us in His own image.  We relinquish our false ideas of ourselves so we can love.  As we empty ourselves of our untrue conceptions of ourselves, God can fill us up with the love* we have seen our brothers and sisters demonstrate for us over the centuries.  

Sometimes we might think this love is out of our reach.  Yet God gives us opportunities to open our hearts and choose this love.  

We can think that saints have nothing to do with us.  We can decide that we are far removed from them.  In addition to saints inspiring us through their outstanding examples, they point out to us to consider what we value, and to act accordingly.  Thus, although at first they might seem distant and unreachable, by pondering their choices, we can come to realize they are closer to us than we had thought, since like they have done, we too must decide everyday who and what are important to us.  Through our choices, we can embrace the types of people the saints treasured.  In how we opt to act, we can show we wish to love others like the saints have done, and thus be close with the saints, honoring their memory.  

Today we remember Saint Lawrence as we celebrate his feast day on this particular date.  He was a deacon in the city of Rome in the third century.  He was charged with giving aid to those in need.  Saint Lawrence loved impoverished people so much that he gave all of the money in his care to poor persons.  He even sold expensive items to be able to give more to those who were indigent.   

Since Saint Lawrence was one of those in charge of funds for the church, Roman officials ordered him to bring them the treasure of the church.  As the priest explained during his sermon today at Mass, in reply to this demand, Saint Lawrence said it would take him a few days to gather this treasure.  Then he brought disabled, blind, ill and needy individuals to the Roman officials.  Saint Lawrence maintained that these outcasts were the treasure of the church.  

In response, the Roman authorities killed Saint Lawrence.  He died while he was tied to a grill set above a fire so that he was roasted alive.  Although Saint Lawrence suffered much as he died, God gave him grace.  He had been so strengthened by God that he made light of his plight.  At one point he told those torturing him to turn him over because he was done on the side that had been cooking.  

Saint Lawrence received grace from God.  Saint Lawrence had humbled himself by cherishing those who were impoverished.  Those who are humble receive grace from God.**  

Those of humble heart are close to those who are least among us.  Jesus told us that whatever we do to those who are least among us, we do to Him.***  People who are humble welcome Jesus into their hearts.  Jesus stands at the doors of our hearts and knocks.  If we open to Him, He can come into our hearts and dine with us.****  The poor stand at our doors and knock.  Jesus, in the poor, stands at our doors and knocks.  If we let the poor in when they knock, they can come in and dine with us.  If we let them into our homes, we let Jesus into our hearts.  

Last week a young couple, interested in volunteering here at the Catholic Worker House, came here to the house, and, over coffee, said that they have let homeless persons sleep in their home.  This man and this woman have opened their hearts to those who have no place to rest their heads.  They have welcomed impoverished individuals into their home, and thus have embraced Jesus.  They have clearly demonstrated that they consider those who are poor as treasures to delicately and gently treat.  

Jesus told us, "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be."*****  Seeing who and what we value, there our hearts reside, in community with them.  As we demonstrate to others that we appreciate them, we welcome them into our hearts.  We can embrace those who are poor and treat them with dignity, helping them to see that they are treasures to be valued, rather than treating them as if they are trash to be discarded.  We can choose to show warmth and tenderness to those who are often cast aside, and thus truly love them.  

If we truly love, we will allow ourselves to be humbled.  As we consent to being humbled, God will give us the grace we need to love our neighbor.  At times in our lives, we might misperceive our neighbor and mistakenly believe she is nothing like us.  Through the grace of God, we can come to have much compassion for our neighbor, once we recognize that our neighbor is much more like us than we had thought.  Seeing our neighbor is more like us than we had thought, we come to love our neighbor as ourselves.******  As we open our hearts to love, we open our hearts to God.  As we seek to always do the will of God by always loving our neighbor, we come to love God with all our heart, mind, soul and strength.*******  Amen.  

* Romans 5:5 
** 1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6 
*** Matthew 25:40 
**** Revelation 3:20 
***** Matthew 6:21; Luke 12:34 
****** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
******* Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27 

Emptying Ourselves Completely

Today is the feast day of Saint Romuald.  Today in the Catholic Church we commemorate the life of this saint who lived in the tenth and the eleventh centuries and who reformed Benedictine monasteries.  In time, his reforms were seen to have formed a new religious congregation of monks who came to be known as Camaldolese, named after their head monastery called Camaldoli, which is in Italy.  

After spending a year and a half living at New Camaldoli Hermitage on the Big Sur coast of California, I grew quite fond of the monks there, as well as the folks who work there too.  While I lived there, I came to realize better how and why we can be nourished deeply in the recesses of our souls by the spiritual disciplines of solitude, silence, prayer and meditation.  There in a dwelling space called a monastic cell, a monk lives as a solitary, assisted by these monastic spiritual practices as he strives to respond to God's call.  These spiritual disciplines position us so that, in opening our hearts to God, we consent to God loving our neighbor through us.  

I was significantly guided in my pursuit of these spiritual practices by the Rule of Saint Romuald.  He wrote it as a brief directive for men who came to monasteries to commune with God.  In his little rule, Saint Romuald counsels 

Sit in your cell as in Paradise.  Put the whole world behind you and forget it.  Watch your thoughts like a good fisherman watching for fish.  The path you must follow is in the Psalms--never leave it.  

If you have just come to the monastery, and in spite of your good will you cannot accomplish what you want, take every opportunity you can to sing the Psalms in your heart and to understand them with your mind.  

And if your mind wanders as you read, do not give up; hurry back and apply your mind to the words once more.  

Realize above all that you are in God's presence, and stand there with the attitude of one who stands before the emperor.  

Empty yourself completely and sit waiting, content with the grace of God, like the chick who tastes nothing and eats nothing but what his mother brings him.  

The Rule of Saint Romuald resonates with how I have sought to orient my life over the last half dozen years.  I do my best to take time to retreat and forget about the world for a time so as to be recollected in my soul.  I have also aimed to forget the false notions the world gives me.  I have been aspiring to forget the false self that the world has tried to convince me I am, as the Trappist monk Thomas Merton describes.  We can choose to reject the empty promises the world makes, vainly suggesting that we always need to be buying and possessing certain items in order to remain relevant in today's ever-changing material world.  Rather than consume our energies on fruitless pursuits, we can direct our focus elsewhere.  In still silent solitude, we are better positioned to listen to God so we can ever more discover our true selves.  

This rule directs us to take every opportunity we can to sing the Psalms in our hearts.  Insofar as we are to pray always,* again the Rule confirms my inclinations.  So often I find myself mindlessly wasting precious time on trivial concerns which ultimately do not matter.  Rather than burn up our energy on matters which are truly unimportant, instead we can strive to orient our hearts toward God in every instant.  

In his rule, Saint Romuald advises us not to feel discouraged when our minds wander from words of wisdom, which they certainly will.  Rather, we are once again to apply ourselves to The Word in front of us.  So often I find my mind straying off course.  Thus I so appreciate Saint Romuald's gentle encouragement, as a reminder to remain on course.  We should not feel downtrodden when we fall, since most certainly we shall fall; we must remain resolute and we must once again rise once we have fallen.  

Saint Romuald reminds us that we are in God's presence.  Jesus is with us always.**  We are to stand before God like a person standing before an emperor.  Seeing ourselves for what we truly are, nothing without the help of God, we are humbled.  Having been humbled, we are well-situated for God to work through the Holy Spirit in us.  

Realizing that we are nothing without the aid of God, we can empty ourselves.  Knowing that we can do nothing without God, we can wait for God to transform us.  Upon being humbled, we can receive the grace and strength from God we need, for God gives grace to the humble.***  

Seeing our true place, and humbled by the reality that we can do nothing without God, we can then open our hearts to God.  If we are silent and wait patiently upon God, we can be nourished by the presence of Jesus.  Our Lord Jesus empowers us to do the will of our Heavenly Father.  I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.****

By the grace of God, we can come to do what by human standards seems impossible.  For humans, to love like God loves is impossible.  For God, nothing is impossible.*****  

Through the grace of God, we become able to give to everyone who asks,****** as Jesus instructs us to do in today's Gospel reading.  Having sought the tender, warm, loving touch of Jesus in silence, stillness and solitude, we become empowered through the gentle strength of His presence to convey His love to others.  By opening our hearts to God, we welcome God into our hearts, so that Jesus abides in us,******* and loves others through us.  Opening our hearts to God, we allow God to love others through us.********  We can thus let the love of God be shown through us.  Let us let God love others through us.  Amen.  

* 1 Thessalonians 5:17 
** Matthew 28:20 
*** 1 Peter 5:5; James 4:6 
**** Philippians 4:13 
***** Matthew 19:26; Luke 1:37 
****** Matthew 5:42 
******* John 15:9 
******** Romans 5:5 

Gentle Little Tap

Today I was happy to cross paths with a particular homeless woman who here I'll call "Anna."  As I was talking with Anna next to the van I use, I opened the back two doors of the van to take something out.  The back doors of the van easily swing.  Even if there's just a little wind, the doors readily swish back and forth.  

At one point, when the back doors of the van were open, Anna was bent over, collecting some of her property which she had placed on the sidewalk.  She got a little distracted from the task at hand.  One of the doors turned toward her, hitting the end of the bill of her baseball cap she was wearing.  She acknowledged the gesture, remarking, "Yes, thank you, God."  

I was struck by how she seized the opportunity to show gratitude to God for a gentle little tap on the head.  It seemed especially touching how she thanked God for that tiny collision given how, she told me, she had spent much of today repeatedly crying.  Even amidst such intense pain she had been feeling, she found it in herself to give thanks always.*  

It is true it was just an insignificant slight bump on the head.  Perhaps one can see it as something to ignore and forget.  Yet, as Jean-Pierre de Caussade counsels us in "The Sacrament of the Present Moment," we are always being afforded opportunities to embrace how God is trying to reach out to us.  In every microscopic fraction of time, as "The Cloud of Unknowing" describes, we have chances to embrace the will of God.  

God speaks to us as we are able to hear.  God gives to us according to our capacity to receive.  God does not give us more than we can handle.**  God gives to us what we can manage, for in our dear Jesus, we do not have an unsympathetic mediator, but rather one who is most certainly sympathetic to us, since He was tested just as we are tested.***  Therefore, God meets us where we are, in the place in which we find ourselves.  Anna had wept much today, and so God gently and lovingly reached out to her and poked her playfully in the head.  

In this vein, when Anna thanked God, I noted, "Yes, Anna.  It's like God was just saying to you, 'Now, Anna, stay on task!'"  

* 1 Thessalonians 5:18 
** 1 Corinthians 10:13 
*** Hebrews 4:15 

Love Visits Gratitude

Yesterday my fellow Catholic Worker Susan visited our homeless friend Fred who was in the hospital.  Recently Fred was riding his bicycle when a collision occurred between him and a tractor trailer truck.  

In visiting Fred, who has been recovering from his injuries, Susan practices a work of mercy.  She follows the church teaching that we should perform the works of mercy.  

Catholics, and especially Catholic Workers, practice the works of mercy.  There are seven corporal works of mercy, partly echoing the counsels of Jesus at the end of the twenty-fifth chapter of the Gospel of Matthew.  We are to feed persons who are hungry.  We are called to give drink to those who are thirsty.  We must shelter those who are homeless.  We visit people who are sick as well as prisoners.  We bury the dead.  God calls us to give alms to impoverished individuals.  

Jesus has told us that when we care for those who are sick, we tend to Him.*  He has explained that when we do something to the least of those among us, we do it to Him.**  

Fred, our homeless friend, living on the fringes of society, is one of the least of those among us.  Jesus Our Lord is present in this vulnerable homeless man.  When we comfort this impoverished man, we are making a gesture of kindness to Jesus.  

When we love the needy person in front of us, we love Jesus.  When we love our neighbor, we love God.  

When the beggar before us is showing us gratitude, Jesus is thanking us.  When the poverty-stricken individual feels relief due to our efforts, we have gently and lovingly touched the Body of Christ.  

There in the hospital, Fred told Susan that he found it comforting to know that someone cares about him.  He was grateful for her visit.  

Susan gave the gift of her presence.  She received the gift of his gratitude.  

We love our neighbor when we visit our neighbor who is sick.  We love our neighbor when we thank our neighbor who visits us when we are sick.  When we express such love in these ways, we show the love we would want to receive if we were in the other person's position.  

We are to love each other as ourselves.***  If we consider that we would want to receive a visit while in the hospital and be showered with love there, then we can see that we are called to visit the sick.  Then we see that we are to go and do likewise.****  

* Matthew 25:35-36 
** Matthew 25:40 
*** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14 
**** Luke 10:37 

Become Like Children

Recently here on the front porch of the Catholic Worker House once again I spoke with a certain homeless woman.  I've talked with her countless times.  Here I'll call her "Marianne."  

Marianne is one of the happiest people I have ever met.  She smiles a lot.  Marianne is very cheerful.  It's not unusual to see her break into song and dance.  

Marianne is very thin.  You could certainly say that she is lean.  

If she suffers from hunger, she doesn't show it.  She is happy like a little child.  She is playful and seems joyful.  

In addition to being happy, she is also respectful.  Recently she politely asked a Catholic Worker here for food.   She meekly requested the food.  She was happy to be given some food.  

Pleased to be receiving whatever she was given, she was grateful for what she was given.  She was thankful for what she got since she relies on the love of others.  

Depending on the love of others, we depend on the love of God.  We rely on God to love us through our neighbor.  

A child of God relies on what God gives her, like a child looking to his or her parents to supply all his or her needs.  In completely depending on God, one becomes great in His sight.  Jesus tells us so when we hear that 

The disciples approached Jesus and said, 
"Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?"  
He called a child over, placed it in their midst, 
and said, "Amen, I say to you, 
unless you turn and become like children, 
you will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven.  
Whoever humbles himself like this child 
is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven."*  

When we humble ourselves, we become great.  We find greatness in simplicity.  We find greatness in having nothing.  When we have nothing, we must turn to God to supply our needs.  

Who is modeling this exemplary behavior for me?  I see this total trust in God in the discarded, forgotten, spurned homeless woman on my front stoop.  We find our exemplar of utter trust in God through Jesus, who completely trusted in His Heavenly Father.  And Jesus is in those who are least among us,** those among us who fully depend on God to meet all their needs.  

Jesus, in the homeless woman who shows up at my front door, demonstrates to me how to follow His teachings.  Who am I, that my Lord and my God should come unto me?  
  
Jesus shows up in our lives.  He stands right in front of us.  He comes to continue instructing us about the Word of God, how to love God by totally relying on God.  By being present to us in our neighbor, he helps us to love each other.  

Jesus is always with us.***  Jesus is greeting us as we meet Him in the impoverished individual in front of us.  Jesus is with us, teaching us through our neighbor, gently guiding us on our spiritual journeys.  In the poor person before us, Jesus is asking us to open our hearts to Him.  

Jesus is bidding us to open our hearts to Him.  He is calling us to listen to Him.  Jesus is telling us to rely on Him.  We are to let go of our delusions that we can do anything good without God.  

Jesus is calling us to deconstruct our misconceptions of ourselves.  We are to see that we are nothing without God.  We are called to realize that we must depend totally on God if we wish to become great.  We can insist on being prideful, but then we would forfeit greatness in the Kingdom of Heaven.  

Jesus invites us to become more than we have been.  Paradoxically, to become more than we have been, we must become less than we have been.  To become great, we must become little.  So that we may become great in the Kingdom of Heaven, Jesus is beckoning us to become like little children.  

* Matthew 18:1-4 
** Matthew 25:40 
*** Matthew 28:20 

Love Your Neighbor

Once again I feel the time is ripe to write.  What do I have to say?  I write about who is right in front of me.  I relate what is happening right in front of me.  Although they might seem ordinary and unremarkable, all our interactions are opportunities for making the world a better place.  When we interact with each other, we are invited to make choices in which we love each other.  

As I've pointed out before, in the end all we will have will be the consequences of our own actions.  After we have died, the time for action will be over.  Therefore, the time for action is now.  

And so I urge you to consider what you can do right now.  How do you feel you can best act right now?  As I've previously encouraged, and as Gandhi suggested, "You must be the change you want to see in the world."  

Do you feel there should be more compassion in the world?  Then be more compassionate.  

Do you feel people should be more tolerant?  Show the tolerance you would like to see.  

Do you believe persons should conduct themselves with more decorum and should respect others more?  Show the respect you would like others to show.  

Model the behavior you want to see being displayed.  Show how you feel people should act.  

Recently someone described to me how he envisioned meeting someone holding drastically different political views than he holds.  He said he imagined embracing the person.  Now I am not suggesting that we should always make such a gesture toward such a person.  However, there are other loving ways of responding to someone with whom I am at odds.  I am recalling situations where a person was yelling at someone else and the recipient of the anger replied in a calm, soft, gentle voice, and the tone of the conversation shifted.  We are responsible for what we bring to every interaction we have.  If we respond with love to someone, we can cause the overall tone of the exchange with that person to be more loving.  Do we want love to reign in the world?  Jesus told us to love each other as He has loved us.*  And so we are called to do our best to love our neighbor.  

Love the person who is right in front of you.  Each of us has responsibilities to each other.  Each of us has responsibilities to ourselves.  

I am remembering a young man who often shows up here at the Catholic Worker House.  Here I'll call him "Brendon."  Brendon is probably in his mid to late twenties.  When I saw him earlier this week, he was taking refuge here at the house from some of the rain.  

As we talked, Brendon admitted to me that he takes illicit drugs.  He looked pale.  As he often does, he seemed to have difficulty focusing.  

He asked, "I don't look good, do I?"  

One of the Catholic Workers here replied, slightly softly, shaking his head, "No, you don't."  

"Thank you for your honesty.  I appreciate that."  

"You're welcome.  That's one of the things I'm supposed to do for you, is be honest with you."  

We began to talk with him about how he could enter a drug rehab program.  He said he was getting someone's help to try to get into a program.

I pointed out to him, "You've taken an important first step.  You've admitted you need help.  You've admitted you can't do this without someone else's help."  

We have the responsibility to ourselves to be honest with ourselves.  We have the responsibility to be honest with each other.  

We are called to love ourselves.  We are called to love each other.  

Love yourself.  Love the person right in front of you.  Listen to the person in front of you.  Even though it may be difficult, especially when someone is saying things we find inconsiderate or hurtful, we can choose to try to show that person the love we wish that person would show to us.  

If we respond to hateful behavior with hate, we show the same offensive behavior we abhor.  We create more pain in addition to the pain we already feel.  We become what we hate.  We become hate.  

Instead of continuing the cycle of hate, Jesus calls us to love our enemies, and to pray for those who persecute us.**  Then, by refusing to be like those who distress us and disturb us through their exclusionary and unwelcoming behavior, we can choose to respond in an inclusive, respectful and considerate way.  Then we create the world we want to see.  By modeling the loving behavior we wish to see in the world, we indeed make the world the kind of place we want it to be.   

* John 13:34 
** Matthew 5:44 

Thanks For Serving

As you probably have been well aware, today is Veterans' Day.  Today I called a particular veteran I know.  

Over the years, he and I have had some rather contentious and heated political discussions.  He and I agree right on target on certain issues, sometimes for the same reasons.  On other matters we share similar concerns but voice those concerns differently in how we vote.  On still other political questions we are diametrically opposed in our views, opinions which each of us vehemently hold.  

We had a lovely and warm conversation.  He thanked me for calling him and wishing him a Happy Veterans' Day and thanking him for serving.  

During the course of the conversation, he caused me to realize how he and I have influenced each other over the years.  He helped me to see how we have led each other to shift our beliefs and behavior.  

He shared with me how he walked into various stores today and was offered complimentary food and beverages because he is a veteran.  As he shared his day with me, and how he was honored because of his service as a veteran, I recalled a homeless vet I know, who I'll call "Ken."  I mentioned to him this homeless vet Ken who has been struggling.  I broke down into tears as I related over the phone how Ken had said some things about himself which troubled me.  

During our phone conversation today, I was comforted by this vet I had called.  He said very little in response when I shared about Ken, but he didn't need to say much.  He just gently soothed me as he listened.  

Later, after we got off the phone, as I was out and about, I crossed paths with Ken.  It had been longer than usual since I had last seen him.  It was good to see him, and I told him so.  

Ken recalled a day about a week ago when he was upset.  I was sitting with him as he was voicing some frustrations he had.  I was saying almost nothing.  At the time, I thought that I was doing little good.  It didn't seem I was doing, or that I could do, much, if anything at all, to help Ken.  Yet today Ken spoke of that day and said that he was grateful for my help that day.  

How can we make a difficult situation better?  How can we help people who are struggling?  Show up.  Listen.  Be there.  Be a friend.  Give them love.  

Opening Our Hearts

This morning a particular homeless man again showed up here at the Catholic Worker House.  I'll call him "Ben."  Whenever we see Ben, we are reminded, by what he does and says, that he is addicted to a certain substance.  Today as usual he was under the influence of this substance.  

He was distraught.  He shared with me that sometimes he gets very angry at himself.  He said he knows that he needs to work on accepting himself.  

I gently said to him, "You have to love yourself."  

He softly replied, "I know."  

Don't crucify yourself.  When you crucify yourself, you crucify Jesus.  Jesus already died for our sins.  When you choose not to love, you sin.  When you decide not to love, you separate yourself from God.  When you refuse to love yourself, you separate yourself from God.  

God wants us to return to Him, but to do so we must accept ourselves.  To love ourselves, we have to open our own hearts to acknowledge our own self-worth.  

When we close our hearts to others, we close our hearts to God.  When we close our hearts on ourselves--when we refuse to become who we have always been meant to be, when we refuse to try our best--we close our hearts to God.  

When we close our hearts to God, we refuse joy.  When we close our hearts to each other, we refuse joy, since we are choosing not to love our neighbor, which God created us to do.  When we close our hearts by not loving ourselves, we are deciding not to be joyful, since we are refusing to be loving human beings, who God created us to be.  

God wants us to be happy.  God wants us to love Him with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our mind, and with all our strength,* and to love each other as ourselves,** and therefore to love ourselves.  

God loves us.  God loves us more than we can comprehend.  To be able to love God, we must love ourselves.  

God wants us to love each other.  To be able to love others, we must love ourselves.  

God wants us to love ourselves.  

* Mark 12:30; Deuteronomy 6:5  
** Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14