Today I was relieved to see a particular homeless woman who I'll call "Anna" again here. Anna showed up to our front porch this morning. We went for a little walk together.
Anna has been having a rough time. In the last couple of weeks she has had a series of stressful interactions in which she has not been treated well, which is understating the circumstances.
I shared with Anna about how I recently heard about some fervent prayer offered up by another Catholic Worker. This other Catholic Worker told me that she had recently been greatly distressed about hearing of how a homeless friend of hers had been abused. This other Catholic Worker channeled her grief into her prayer. As she was praying the rosary, she wept as she thought of her homeless friend being abused. In the midst of her tears, she seized upon that grief, and it catalyzed her to desperately clutch her rosary and ardently pray for both for her homeless friend as well as for those who had abused her.
I tried to explain to Anna how I feel that when we feel we are being tested beyond our limits, it is exactly then that we are presented with our greatest opportunities to serve our neighbor. I maintained that at such moments, we have such excellent chances to pray well because we mean it so much. It is when we are sorely in need that we pray effectively.
Anna told me that rather than praying to God, much of the time she just gets angry at God. I shared with her how some of the saints struggled much with anger. Although I didn't mention them specifically at the time, I was thinking about Saint Jerome and Saint Paul.
I also told Anna that when I'm frustrated or tired, often I throw up my hands and tell God that I feel like I'm failing, that I'm not responding as He would like me to react in situations. I shared with Anna how God is pleased when we talk to Him, even when we're angry. At least then we're in contact with God. At the time, I didn't think to mention it to Anna, but also, if we're expressing our anger to God, at least we're being honest with Him.
Then Anna lamented that she feels that God is delighting in her misfortune. I replied softly that God is deeply saddened when people mistreat each other. I pointed out that God has given us our free will to do as we please; unfortunately some persons misuse their freedom by abusing their neighbor instead of loving their neighbor as themselves* as Jesus taught us to do. I said to Anna that God does not enjoy our being mistreated, since God is love.**
God is love, and so He loves us. He wishes that we grow as individuals, and grow closer to Him. We grow close to Him when we pray to Him. When we face dire circumstances, let us pray to Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength, loving Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength.*** The God who loves us infinitely works all for the good of those who love Him.**** Thus God loves us in the midst of our ordeals, and in such trials we are presented with incredible opportunities to ask Him to work wonders in and through us, if we implore Him with all we have. Let us turn to God, open our hearts to Him, love Him, and feel His infinite love. Amen.
* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14
** 1 John 4:8,16
*** Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27
**** Romans 8:28
Anna has been having a rough time. In the last couple of weeks she has had a series of stressful interactions in which she has not been treated well, which is understating the circumstances.
I shared with Anna about how I recently heard about some fervent prayer offered up by another Catholic Worker. This other Catholic Worker told me that she had recently been greatly distressed about hearing of how a homeless friend of hers had been abused. This other Catholic Worker channeled her grief into her prayer. As she was praying the rosary, she wept as she thought of her homeless friend being abused. In the midst of her tears, she seized upon that grief, and it catalyzed her to desperately clutch her rosary and ardently pray for both for her homeless friend as well as for those who had abused her.
I tried to explain to Anna how I feel that when we feel we are being tested beyond our limits, it is exactly then that we are presented with our greatest opportunities to serve our neighbor. I maintained that at such moments, we have such excellent chances to pray well because we mean it so much. It is when we are sorely in need that we pray effectively.
Anna told me that rather than praying to God, much of the time she just gets angry at God. I shared with her how some of the saints struggled much with anger. Although I didn't mention them specifically at the time, I was thinking about Saint Jerome and Saint Paul.
I also told Anna that when I'm frustrated or tired, often I throw up my hands and tell God that I feel like I'm failing, that I'm not responding as He would like me to react in situations. I shared with Anna how God is pleased when we talk to Him, even when we're angry. At least then we're in contact with God. At the time, I didn't think to mention it to Anna, but also, if we're expressing our anger to God, at least we're being honest with Him.
Then Anna lamented that she feels that God is delighting in her misfortune. I replied softly that God is deeply saddened when people mistreat each other. I pointed out that God has given us our free will to do as we please; unfortunately some persons misuse their freedom by abusing their neighbor instead of loving their neighbor as themselves* as Jesus taught us to do. I said to Anna that God does not enjoy our being mistreated, since God is love.**
God is love, and so He loves us. He wishes that we grow as individuals, and grow closer to Him. We grow close to Him when we pray to Him. When we face dire circumstances, let us pray to Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength, loving Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength.*** The God who loves us infinitely works all for the good of those who love Him.**** Thus God loves us in the midst of our ordeals, and in such trials we are presented with incredible opportunities to ask Him to work wonders in and through us, if we implore Him with all we have. Let us turn to God, open our hearts to Him, love Him, and feel His infinite love. Amen.
* Matthew 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Leviticus 19:18; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14
** 1 John 4:8,16
*** Deuteronomy 6:5; Deuteronomy 10:12; Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30; Luke 10:27
**** Romans 8:28
No comments:
Post a Comment